how do i make good dialogue for my visual novel game?

[anorex]

boi why am i so bad at making dialogue this is straight ass cheeks

 

[giga.mia]

Are you a male or female? There is an idea for a visual novel that I would love to have happen but I’m not a programmer

 

[kornfan]

i

boi why am i so bad at making dialogue this is straight ass cheeks

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don’t see anything wrong

 

[anorex]

Are you a male or female? There is an idea for a visual novel that I would love to have happen but I’m not a programmer

female its gonna be a romance but ive got no clue

 

[winterfoid]

boi why am i so bad at making dialogue this is straight ass cheeks

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Main issue i see with this dialogue its the verbage is so plain that it doesn't convey how the characters are actually feeling/what their personality is like/what their motivation behind the conversation is. That can be fixed with punctuation in different places and a little tweaking to the words

ex.
"So... were you up to anything over the weekend?"
"Lucy! Anything fun happen this weekend?"
"Well, how was your weekend?"
that's pretty low effort but you get what i mean hopefully. all 3 lines have a different tone, your issue with the original might be that the tone is very flat and generic. i'd just experiment with different lines

 

[anorex]

Main issue i see with this dialogue its the verbage is so plain that it doesn't convey how the characters are actually feeling/what their personality is like/what their motivation behind the conversation is. That can be fixed with punctuation in different places and a little tweaking to the words

ex.
"So... were you up to anything over the weekend?"
"Lucy! Anything fun happen this weekend?"
"Well, how was your weekend?"
that's pretty low effort but you get what i mean hopefully. all 3 lines have a different tone, your issue with the original might be that the tone is very flat and generic. i'd just experiment with different lines

you explained that really well, thank you!