- Joined
- Oct 14, 2024
- Messages
- 821
- Reputation
- 2,694
I hate seeing other ppl my age happy. It makes me think abt what I lack and I know exactly what I do. Ik it’s selfish idgaf
I remember what dandelions said it was something abt ascending past middle school is useless. Obv that’s not the end all be all but i was an ugly loser in middle school and I only became average when I turned 16. I had only 2 friends in middle school and I would jsut spend all day talking to them on discord and playing Roblox with them bc that’s all we could do during quarantine.
I still am extremely unhappy with myself even after doing all the softmaxxing I could have possibly done.
It’s ironic bc I’ve gotten to the point where ppl are attracted to me and I should be happy but I hate going out, even going to school bc I’m terrified of people looking at me. I get invited to parties by one of my friends but I always end up leaving the earliest bc I’m ND and I end up leaving bc I get so terrified of interacting with people and I get physical reactions from being so anxious and I lack social cues. I basically have almost everything I strived for, looks wise aside from hardmaxxing but I’m still depressed as shit and am still hideous compared to everyone else. I barely have any friends and they’re always too busy for me and I genuinely believe I’m cooked for the rest of my life socially bc of my inability to interact with anybody normally
OK thanks for reading
I remember what dandelions said it was something abt ascending past middle school is useless. Obv that’s not the end all be all but i was an ugly loser in middle school and I only became average when I turned 16. I had only 2 friends in middle school and I would jsut spend all day talking to them on discord and playing Roblox with them bc that’s all we could do during quarantine.
I still am extremely unhappy with myself even after doing all the softmaxxing I could have possibly done.
It’s ironic bc I’ve gotten to the point where ppl are attracted to me and I should be happy but I hate going out, even going to school bc I’m terrified of people looking at me. I get invited to parties by one of my friends but I always end up leaving the earliest bc I’m ND and I end up leaving bc I get so terrified of interacting with people and I get physical reactions from being so anxious and I lack social cues. I basically have almost everything I strived for, looks wise aside from hardmaxxing but I’m still depressed as shit and am still hideous compared to everyone else. I barely have any friends and they’re always too busy for me and I genuinely believe I’m cooked for the rest of my life socially bc of my inability to interact with anybody normally
OK thanks for reading
