Struggling with Discipline – Ready to Finally Transform

[lilrubinho]

--Serious Post--


Hey everyone,


I’m Robin, 22 years old, living in Switzerland. I’ve been reading this forum for a while and finally decided to join because I’m done with lying to myself.


I currently weigh around 185 kg (408 lbs) at 1.80 m (5'11"). My weight has been a lifelong struggle – I’ve tried everything: calorie counting, intermittent fasting, carnivore, vegetarian, low carb, intuitive eating, even water fasting. I lost 15 kg once through calorie tracking, but gained it all back and more. I even tried Wegovy (something like Ozempic). Surgery is no option for me.


The real issue isn’t knowledge or tools – it’s discipline. I start strong, but the moment something breaks the routine, I fall off hard. A missed weigh-in, an untracked meal, and suddenly I'm binging again. I’ve realized that my problem is deeper: I’ve tied my identity to being the "funny fat guy" as a defense. It’s killing me inside.


I’m not here to get sympathy – I’m here to finally change. Looksmaxxing isn’t just about looks for me, it’s about reclaiming my self-respect, my health, and becoming a man I can be proud of.


I’d love to hear from people who struggled with extreme weight and finally turned things around – what clicked for you? How did you finally break the cycle?


Looking forward to growing together.


– Robin

 

[lifelover]

welcome!

i have struggled with weight loss too but managed to turn it around and have lost close to 25kg.

what i recommend is that even if you “fail” for one day and even weeks, get back to that routine you were trying and with time and will become easier and easier. pat yourself on the back and keep going, because if you see every mistake as a big failure you won’t be able to sustain it for a long time like it’s need.

 

[lilrubinho]

welcome!

i have struggled with weight loss too but managed to turn it around and have lost close to 25kg.

what i recommend is that even if you “fail” for one day and even weeks, get back to that routine you were trying and with time and will become easier and easier. pat yourself on the back and keep going, because if you see every mistake as a big failure you won’t be able to sustain it for a long time like it’s need.

---

Thanks for the encouragement, man – and congrats on the 25 kg, that’s huge.


I totally agree with what you’re saying, and I’ve tried to adopt that mindset many times. The problem for me is that each “bounce back” becomes weaker. Like, after one slip-up, I might push myself to get back on track, but the time it takes to relapse gets shorter and shorter. Eventually, I just spiral and completely give up. That’s been my pattern for the past 7 years.


So it’s not that I think a bad day = total failure. I try to recover. But over time, the discipline erodes and I go back to zero. I'm not saying this as a cope – this is just what I've observed in myself.


That’s why I’m here now. I know I need to approach this differently if I ever want to break the cycle for real.

 

[over0]

---

Thanks for the encouragement, man – and congrats on the 25 kg, that’s huge.


I totally agree with what you’re saying, and I’ve tried to adopt that mindset many times. The problem for me is that each “bounce back” becomes weaker. Like, after one slip-up, I might push myself to get back on track, but the time it takes to relapse gets shorter and shorter. Eventually, I just spiral and completely give up. That’s been my pattern for the past 7 years.


So it’s not that I think a bad day = total failure. I try to recover. But over time, the discipline erodes and I go back to zero. I'm not saying this as a cope – this is just what I've observed in myself.


That’s why I’m here now. I know I need to approach this differently if I ever want to break the cycle for real.

You need to think about it as the way that it is. A battle for your life. You're still young and if you don't change now it will be borderline impossible in the future. It's amazing to hear you wanna change and you're already on the right track by acknowledging your issues with discipline and it's importance. Calorie deficit and movement is key. There's this really cool story of this guy who was probably a bit heavier than you who started his weight loss journey by literally just flopping about. You can do this even if it seems difficult and you've had setbacks

 

[lifelover]

---

Thanks for the encouragement, man – and congrats on the 25 kg, that’s huge.


I totally agree with what you’re saying, and I’ve tried to adopt that mindset many times. The problem for me is that each “bounce back” becomes weaker. Like, after one slip-up, I might push myself to get back on track, but the time it takes to relapse gets shorter and shorter. Eventually, I just spiral and completely give up. That’s been my pattern for the past 7 years.


So it’s not that I think a bad day = total failure. I try to recover. But over time, the discipline erodes and I go back to zero. I'm not saying this as a cope – this is just what I've observed in myself.


That’s why I’m here now. I know I need to approach this differently if I ever want to break the cycle for real.

I went through the same for some years too and i get everything you’re saying.

but you need to keep yourself accountable and probably be harsher too.

create reasonable goals and try to follow them, keep yourself accountable.

it’s not healthy but what helped me keep want to change and never go back was watching videos of obese people struggling hard and thinking to myself “i dont wanna end up that way”

if only trying doesn’t work you probably need different plans, mental triggers etc.

anyway i recommend that you get back on semaglutied because even it it’s a little it still helps, or even considering bariatric surgery.

 

[lilrubinho]

You need to think about it as the way that it is. A battle for your life. You're still young and if you don't change now it will be borderline impossible in the future. It's amazing to hear you wanna change and you're already on the right track by acknowledging your issues with discipline and it's importance. Calorie deficit and movement is key. There's this really cool story of this guy who was probably a bit heavier than you who started his weight loss journey by literally just flopping about. You can do this even if it seems difficult and you've had setbacks

Appreciate the tough love – you're absolutely right. It is a battle for my life. And honestly, that’s how I’ve started seeing it too. I’ve wasted so many years convincing myself that I have time… but I don’t. If I don’t fix this now, I’ll be 40 and stuck in the same body, with even more damage to undo.


I’ve come to accept that discipline isn’t optional – it’s survival. And you’re right, the fact that I’m here and open about it is at least something. But I don’t want to just talk anymore, I want real results. No more starting over every few weeks.


That being said: What kind of nutrition plan would you recommend I follow now? Should I just go for a simple calorie deficit, like 300 kcal below maintenance and track everything? Or did something else work better for you? I feel like I need something sustainable but strict enough to show progress.


Thanks again for the response – means a lot.

 

[lilrubinho]

I went through the same for some years too and i get everything you’re saying.

but you need to keep yourself accountable and probably be harsher too.

create reasonable goals and try to follow them, keep yourself accountable.

it’s not healthy but what helped me keep want to change and never go back was watching videos of obese people struggling hard and thinking to myself “i dont wanna end up that way”

if only trying doesn’t work you probably need different plans, mental triggers etc.

anyway i recommend that you get back on semaglutied because even it it’s a little it still helps, or even considering bariatric surgery.

Thanks again, I really appreciate your input – it's helpful to get advice from someone who's actually made progress.


I’ve actually tried semaglutide. I was on it for a short time, but to be honest, it didn’t go well for me. It triggered a lot of depressive symptoms – really heavy stuff mentally – and the actual weight loss effect only lasted about a month. After that, I was almost eating normally again, just with slightly less appetite. It wasn't a sustainable change for me.


As for bariatric surgery: I’ve done the research, had an in-depth conversation with an endocrinologist, and decided it’s not an option for me. There are a lot of long-term side effects people don’t talk about enough. For example, my doctor said I’d likely have to inject vitamins for the rest of my life because my body wouldn’t be able to absorb them through food anymore. That honestly freaked me out. I want to heal my body, not become even more dependent on interventions.


I also have visible signs of insulin resistance – I developed dark patches of skin (acanthosis nigricans), which are a pretty strong indicator that my body’s been overworked by my eating habits for too long. It’s a constant reminder that I need to change, but also that this isn’t just about looks – it’s about survival.


So yeah, I’m trying to rebuild this from the ground up. Naturally, if possible. With structure, support, and discipline. I’m not giving up yet.


Would be great to hear more about what helped you stay consistent long term – especially after the initial weight drop.
What kind of plan worked best for you when you lost the weight? Was it just calorie deficit and movement, or did you follow something more specific like low carb or OMAD?

 

[2R0I2P0]

Looking forward to growing together.


– Robin

Hello robin welcome to .com, happy to see your commitment to getting a better lifestyle.


If you already know , can you talk more about what "triggers" your compulsive eating if such or what comes through your head?.

 

[over0]

Appreciate the tough love – you're absolutely right. It is a battle for my life. And honestly, that’s how I’ve started seeing it too. I’ve wasted so many years convincing myself that I have time… but I don’t. If I don’t fix this now, I’ll be 40 and stuck in the same body, with even more damage to undo.


I’ve come to accept that discipline isn’t optional – it’s survival. And you’re right, the fact that I’m here and open about it is at least something. But I don’t want to just talk anymore, I want real results. No more starting over every few weeks.


That being said: What kind of nutrition plan would you recommend I follow now? Should I just go for a simple calorie deficit, like 300 kcal below maintenance and track everything? Or did something else work better for you? I feel like I need something sustainable but strict enough to show progress.


Thanks again for the response – means a lot.

I think immediately jumping downs gonna be tough for you so maybe try and start with just 300 like you said then drop 50 call everyweek. Movement can help increase you're possible calorie intake so I'd you feel like it's not enough. High protein meals and volume eating (chicken,fruits, vegtables and yogurt) is what I suggest and what worked for me and even diet drinks + gum can be helpful for some

 

[2R0I2P0]

I think immediately jumping downs gonna be tough for you so maybe try and start with just 300 like you said then drop 50 call everyweek. Movement can help increase you're possible calorie intake so I'd you feel like it's not enough. High protein meals and volume eating (chicken,fruits, vegtables and yogurt) is what I suggest and what worked for me and even diet drinks + gum can be helpful for some

Pyrocinical with his sparkling water.

 

[lilrubinho]

whats Pyrocinical, when I google it I just find a YouTuber.

Pyrocinical with his sparkling water.

 

[lilrubinho]

Hello robin welcome to .com, happy to see your commitment to getting a better lifestyle.


If you already know , can you talk more about what "triggers" your compulsive eating if such or what comes through your head?.

Thank you for the warm welcome – I really appreciate it.


As for what triggers my compulsive eating… it’s a mix of emotional and habitual patterns. The strongest trigger is usually emotional stress – loneliness, frustration, or feeling like I’m falling behind in life. Food has always been a way to escape or numb that feeling. Especially in the evenings or at night, when everything quiets down and I’m left alone with my thoughts.


Another big one is all-or-nothing thinking. If I’ve been doing well for a few days and then slip up, my brain instantly goes: “Well, you already failed. Might as well go all in and start over next week.” It’s like I’m either 100% on track or completely out of control. That mindset has sabotaged me countless times.


Also, sometimes it’s just pure habit. I associate certain games, shows or YouTube sessions with snacking – even if I’m not hungry at all. I think I’ve trained myself to link dopamine with food, and now it’s an automatic behavior loop.


I’m working on breaking these patterns, but it’s honestly the hardest part – even harder than exercising or tracking food. I’d love to hear how others overcame these mental triggers.

 

[2R0I2P0]

Thank you for the warm welcome – I really appreciate it.

As for what triggers my compulsive eating… it’s a mix of emotional and habitual patterns. The strongest trigger is usually emotional stress – loneliness, frustration, or feeling like I’m falling behind in life. Food has always been a way to escape or numb that feeling. Especially in the evenings or at night, when everything quiets down and I’m left alone with my thoughts.

Hello yeah, no problem; i hope we can break it down for you. I totally understand your point of view i do not have a problem with overeating more like the opposite. But i do understand, i do have habits that prevent me from going insane.

Also, sometimes it’s just pure habit. I associate certain games, shows or YouTube sessions with snacking – even if I’m not hungry at all. I think I’ve trained myself to link dopamine with food, and now it’s an automatic behavior loop.

Not the same, but i use to have a smoking habit, i went to a therapist that i confided in him about it he told me to put distance in between you and the reinforcement. In this case, it would be putting your snacks outside so you have to do the physical effort to go for the stimuli, this usually works as it works to wean you off from the habit.

As well as substituting them with more healthy options, that being "cecina" that it's dried meat with citruses that has less calories you should be able to do it at home just look for a recipe, or beef jerky, as well as more fiber oriented food like fruits, i heard that apples in europe are pretty good. As well as dates when you are craving that sugar. With coffee or tea.

So, look at it this way it's a matter of trying to break the habit by putting physical distance with the habit itself, and substituting the stimuli so that you get a result more aligned with your desired state . As well, it could be considered unhealthy, but sometimes let's say having gum can ease your cravings because of you doing something with your mouth....or more unhealthy having stimulants like coffee or nicotine.

And if for example you are left alone and are in despair, i suggest looking into TIP skills, they are quick patches to fix the dopamine, norepinephrine and such neurotransmissions.

I’m working on breaking these patterns, but it’s honestly the hardest part – even harder than exercising or tracking food. I’d love to hear how others overcame these mental triggers.

And starting lightly helps, start with few goals let's say walking thirty minutes, as you told us that your build is like a beef wellington this would mean for you a high calorie burning activity .

I suggest you do yourself a list of things you would like to do and try doing them if you fail/ in something drop it and do the other thingg the important thing is that you remain consistent at least to one thing.

 

[2R0I2P0]

whats Pyrocinical, when I google it I just find a YouTuber.

yeah he is, JAJA he like a lot of sugary drinks but he changed that for sparkling water only

 

[lifelover]

Would be great to hear more about what helped you stay consistent long term – especially after the initial weight drop.
What kind of plan worked best for you when you lost the weight? Was it just calorie deficit and movement, or did you follow something more specific like low carb or OMAD?

a simple calorie deficit with whole foods and enough protein + weight training and cardio is the best on the long run.

i wouldn’t recommend OMAD for people inclined to binge eat, which was my case too.

i have 6 meals distributed throughout the day and it’s the best to stay in the diet and prevent cravings.

 

[Randomized Shame]

Welcome to the forums man. Hopefully you find whatever you're looking for.