Serious what is your reason to stay

[nervous]

to preface i don't want your sympathy, i am not weak. it just feels more real to write it out.
i am self-aware
i'm a disappointment
i've always been one.

growing up, everyone around me continuously praised me for my achievements. i was so bright. i was a model student. a model sister. a model friend. everything came easily to me. learning things was my favorite passtime. i think i learned too much too soon.
i always was occupied with sports or schoolwork. i didnt have time to breathe, let alone think. then it all stopped. i think around covid was the downfall of my tight knit social circle, and the little grasp i had on reality. i realized i was ugly. i realized i wasn't worth saving. still, i kept going. kept putting my all into things i didn't care about. kept distracting myself so that my brain kept quiet. until it couldn't anymore. passive ideations turned into a very intentional focus. i wanted to die.

things went downhill very quickly. years passed and i still havent gathered the courage to do it. someone passed away recently, and i saw how much the expenses were for the funeral. my parents can't afford that. id feel too sad for my cat.

my whole life, and even death would come as a major inconvenience. im selfish but id rather not put my family through that.

theres two ways out. i man up and finally give myself one last purpose. or i learn how to live.

where do i go from here.

 

[Napoleon]

I do NOT have a degree in yapology to read all of this, DNR sorry friend.

 

[nervous]

I do NOT have a degree in yapology to read all of this, DNR sorry friend.

that's alright. thanks for attempting.

 

[mertvyy]

almost everyone felt that at some point, you'll grow out of it. a bad time isn't a bad life

 

[nervous]

almost everyone felt that at some point, you'll grow out of it. a bad time isn't a bad life

i'm just sad because it's been so long. i've felt this way for over five years now and i can't imagine being an adult and still feeling so miserable

 

[sociopath]

depends on what learning how to live looks for you if its just being 'high functioning' then u will crash again similarly to covid if its actually healing then it takes time and consistency and more hard work but the fruits will be beautiful and sweet unlike the fruits that will rot once you crash again. find the root of ur sadness and squash it or it will infest your fruit forever.

 

[Marlonmogsyouhaha]

Most suffering is imagined. Even if it's not what's the point in cutting things short instead of just seeing things through and hoping you get lucky? That's all life is anyways

 

[Notover0]

Most suffering is imagined. Even if it's not what's the point in cutting things short instead of just seeing things through and hoping you get lucky? That's all life is anyways

Can't take you seriously with this pfp

 

[nervous]

depends on what learning how to live looks for you if its just being 'high functioning' then u will crash again similarly to covid if its actually healing then it takes time and consistency and more hard work but the fruits will be beautiful and sweet unlike the fruits that will rot once you crash again. find the root of ur sadness and squash it or it will infest your fruit forever.

thank you for this. I’m very high functioning. no one knew I was struggling until I attempted. they still don’t believe me because I’m so smiley. I’m just having trouble determining what is so wrong with me. when I find the root it will be easier

 

[moonlight1]

to preface i don't want your sympathy, i am not weak. it just feels more real to write it out.
i am self-aware
i'm a disappointment
i've always been one.

growing up, everyone around me continuously praised me for my achievements. i was so bright. i was a model student. a model sister. a model friend. everything came easily to me. learning things was my favorite passtime. i think i learned too much too soon.
i always was occupied with sports or schoolwork. i didnt have time to breathe, let alone think. then it all stopped. i think around covid was the downfall of my tight knit social circle, and the little grasp i had on reality. i realized i was ugly. i realized i wasn't worth saving. still, i kept going. kept putting my all into things i didn't care about. kept distracting myself so that my brain kept quiet. until it couldn't anymore. passive ideations turned into a very intentional focus. i wanted to die.

things went downhill very quickly. years passed and i still havent gathered the courage to do it. someone passed away recently, and i saw how much the expenses were for the funeral. my parents can't afford that. id feel too sad for my cat.

my whole life, and even death would come as a major inconvenience. im selfish but id rather not put my family through that.

theres two ways out. i man up and finally give myself one last purpose. or i learn how to live.

where do i go from here.

i have hope for the future

 

[nervous]

Most suffering is imagined. Even if it's not what's the point in cutting things short instead of just seeing things through and hoping you get lucky? That's all life is anyways

yeah tbh I need the bad to appreciate the good but sometimes it’s unbearable. is this really all there is to life

 

[nervous]

i have hope for the future

what do you hope for?

 

[Marlonmogsyouhaha]

yeah tbh I need the bad to appreciate the good but sometimes it’s unbearable. is this really all there is to life

Most life is purely suffering. Think about it, chances are if you died tomorrow and was reborn, you'd likely end up being born in he slums of Sudan, beaten by your parents, starving daily, with no future. Being born with access to Internet, opportunities in life and safeish is more than lucky.

We can only make the most of it and do the best we can. Searching for meaning or purpose only makes our suffering worse

 

[nervous]

Most life is purely suffering. Think about it, chances are if you died tomorrow and was reborn, you'd likely end up being born in he slums of Sudan, beaten by your parents, starving daily, with no future. Being born with access to Internet, opportunities in life and safeish is more than lucky.

We can only make the most of it and do the best we can. Searching for meaning or purpose only makes our suffering worse

damn thank you I needed this. good to know people still have a working brain here. I’m pretty ungrateful.

 

[moonlight1]

what do you hope for?

i hope to have my own family, marry someone I love(i really hope it’s the boy I like rn haha), have children, have friends and not feel lonely anymore, do things I like, learn things, know more places, more to another country, be a doctor, many things

 

[moonlight1]

to preface i don't want your sympathy, i am not weak. it just feels more real to write it out.
i am self-aware
i'm a disappointment
i've always been one.

growing up, everyone around me continuously praised me for my achievements. i was so bright. i was a model student. a model sister. a model friend. everything came easily to me. learning things was my favorite passtime. i think i learned too much too soon.
i always was occupied with sports or schoolwork. i didnt have time to breathe, let alone think. then it all stopped. i think around covid was the downfall of my tight knit social circle, and the little grasp i had on reality. i realized i was ugly. i realized i wasn't worth saving. still, i kept going. kept putting my all into things i didn't care about. kept distracting myself so that my brain kept quiet. until it couldn't anymore. passive ideations turned into a very intentional focus. i wanted to die.

things went downhill very quickly. years passed and i still havent gathered the courage to do it. someone passed away recently, and i saw how much the expenses were for the funeral. my parents can't afford that. id feel too sad for my cat.

my whole life, and even death would come as a major inconvenience. im selfish but id rather not put my family through that.

theres two ways out. i man up and finally give myself one last purpose. or i learn how to live.

where do i go from here.

find something to love for, God saved me

 

[nervous]

i hope to have my own family, marry someone I love(i really hope it’s the boy I like rn haha), have children, have friends and not feel lonely anymore, do things I like, learn things, know more places, more to another country, be a doctor, many things

I truly hope. from the bottom of my heart. that you get exactly that. maybe I’d be less lonely if I felt accepted. I want to move as far away as possible too.

 

[polonae]

to preface i don't want your sympathy, i am not weak. it just feels more real to write it out.
i am self-aware
i'm a disappointment
i've always been one.

growing up, everyone around me continuously praised me for my achievements. i was so bright. i was a model student. a model sister. a model friend. everything came easily to me. learning things was my favorite passtime. i think i learned too much too soon.
i always was occupied with sports or schoolwork. i didnt have time to breathe, let alone think. then it all stopped. i think around covid was the downfall of my tight knit social circle, and the little grasp i had on reality. i realized i was ugly. i realized i wasn't worth saving. still, i kept going. kept putting my all into things i didn't care about. kept distracting myself so that my brain kept quiet. until it couldn't anymore. passive ideations turned into a very intentional focus. i wanted to die.

things went downhill very quickly. years passed and i still havent gathered the courage to do it. someone passed away recently, and i saw how much the expenses were for the funeral. my parents can't afford that. id feel too sad for my cat.

my whole life, and even death would come as a major inconvenience. im selfish but id rather not put my family through that.

theres two ways out. i man up and finally give myself one last purpose. or i learn how to live.

where do i go from here.

not one molecule but ill answer the question but i wanna blast roids and mog

 

[Grilldaddy❤️]

Uhmm ok

 

[nervous]

not one molecule but ill answer the question but i wanna blast roids and mog

you think roids are worth staying alive for?

 

[polonae]

you think roids are worth staying alive for?

and the internet

 

[nervous]

Uhmm ok

I liked it more when people pretended to read my ramblings

 

[nervous]

and the internet

I’ll give you that. The internet will be our eventual demise

 

[moonlight1]

I truly hope. from the bottom of my heart. that you get exactly that. maybe I’d be less lonely if I felt accepted. I want to move as far away as possible too.

yes I also don’t feel very accepted, I feel like I chase ppl too much and to feel accepted O create a character for them
I hope things get better for u
I’m from south America and I wanna move to Poland(or maybe Italy idk), hbu?

 

[nervous]

yes I also don’t feel very accepted, I feel like I chase ppl too much and to feel accepted O create a character for them
I hope things get better for u
I’m from south America and I wanna move to Poland(or maybe Italy idk), hbu?

I think I care too much.
I care so much more than people will ever know. But I am very good at pretending. My “true self” is hiding somewhere in me.
I’m from a small town. People come here to escape their big city pressures. But I’m suffocated. Ideally I’d like to move somewhere near the ocean. That’s my one ask.
I hope things get better for you too.

 

[emeraldpill]

Felt this a lot i feel like most of anything I’ve ever done has been for nothing

Or at least nothing meaningful

 

[nervous]

Felt this a lot i feel like most of anything I’ve ever done has been for nothing

Or at least nothing meaningful

we can only hope it wasn’t for nothing. the only guarantee in life is death. I just hope people aren’t as superficial as they all seem.

 

[2carlet]

to preface i don't want your sympathy, i am not weak. it just feels more real to write it out.
i am self-aware
i'm a disappointment
i've always been one.

growing up, everyone around me continuously praised me for my achievements. i was so bright. i was a model student. a model sister. a model friend. everything came easily to me. learning things was my favorite passtime. i think i learned too much too soon.
i always was occupied with sports or schoolwork. i didnt have time to breathe, let alone think. then it all stopped. i think around covid was the downfall of my tight knit social circle, and the little grasp i had on reality. i realized i was ugly. i realized i wasn't worth saving. still, i kept going. kept putting my all into things i didn't care about. kept distracting myself so that my brain kept quiet. until it couldn't anymore. passive ideations turned into a very intentional focus. i wanted to die.

things went downhill very quickly. years passed and i still havent gathered the courage to do it. someone passed away recently, and i saw how much the expenses were for the funeral. my parents can't afford that. id feel too sad for my cat.

my whole life, and even death would come as a major inconvenience. im selfish but id rather not put my family through that.

theres two ways out. i man up and finally give myself one last purpose. or i learn how to live.

where do i go from here.

I honestly don’t have one, I’m just scared that things could get better and I don’t get to experience it

 

[emeraldpill]

we can only hope it wasn’t for nothing. the only guarantee in life is death. I just hope people aren’t as superficial as they all seem.

I suppose, but there are certainly things I’ve wanted to do in life that I haven’t or aren’t able to anymore that I think would give me a better sense of meaning and fulfilment than what I do now

I don’t think I would ever kill myself but there are times I wouldn’t have minded it happening through something out of my control

 

[nervous]

I suppose, but there are certainly things I’ve wanted to do in life that I haven’t or aren’t able to anymore that I think would give me a better sense of meaning and fulfilment than what I do now

I don’t think I would ever kill myself but there are times I wouldn’t have minded it happening through something out of my control

what do you want to do with your life? in an ideal world that is. I might be able to take some inspiration from your thoughts.

 

[emeraldpill]

what do you want to do with your life? in an ideal world that is. I might be able to take some inspiration from your thoughts.

I don’t really know anymore, I used to be ambitious and driven, and I wanted to contribute to something greater

Now, I struggle to find meaning in much of what I do, or hope to do

 

[aspiringd0ll]

Cus if i kms theyll find my .com account and thats worse than living

 

[Vergil444]

to preface i don't want your sympathy, i am not weak. it just feels more real to write it out.
i am self-aware
i'm a disappointment
i've always been one.

growing up, everyone around me continuously praised me for my achievements. i was so bright. i was a model student. a model sister. a model friend. everything came easily to me. learning things was my favorite passtime. i think i learned too much too soon.
i always was occupied with sports or schoolwork. i didnt have time to breathe, let alone think. then it all stopped. i think around covid was the downfall of my tight knit social circle, and the little grasp i had on reality. i realized i was ugly. i realized i wasn't worth saving. still, i kept going. kept putting my all into things i didn't care about. kept distracting myself so that my brain kept quiet. until it couldn't anymore. passive ideations turned into a very intentional focus. i wanted to die.

things went downhill very quickly. years passed and i still havent gathered the courage to do it. someone passed away recently, and i saw how much the expenses were for the funeral. my parents can't afford that. id feel too sad for my cat.

my whole life, and even death would come as a major inconvenience. im selfish but id rather not put my family through that.

theres two ways out. i man up and finally give myself one last purpose. or i learn how to live.

where do i go from here.

Follow a purpose and pursue your dreams; my dream is to become an elite army operator with various operational courses and knowledge from a military engineering academy.
While others are out there, living with whatever comes their way, I'm trying to become more handsome, smarter, and trying to be better.
I really don't mean to sound arrogant, but that's what many people do: try to improve themselves, find meaning in their dreams, and develop habits that help them achieve a certain position or something in society it is very good.
But of course, if you really think outside the box, it's simply something that's put in your head; having a job in society or achieving a dream, It makes the gears of a country turn.
So if you don't want to live in society, a good choice is to try to become irresistible and do something even more difficult: find a decent girl and live in the middle of a forest in a more rustic and neanderthal way.(I think a lot about that last option.)
Nobody really cares about you or me, maybe those who love you or care about you (except God, he loves everyone).
To be someone, in the eyes of others, is to have a position in society, a daily commitment, earn good money, and do something considered "important."
For me, being someone means having personality, tastes, and character.
Status only changes a person's position, but for me, what matters is what's inside.
Try to find your purpose, not for society and not for your family, but your own. Your calling.

 

[Ferulian]

i have to get to lcl so I can larp about being new to the forum and making rate threads where I steal all of the .com foids

 

[Garce]

to preface i don't want your sympathy, i am not weak. it just feels more real to write it out.
i am self-aware
i'm a disappointment
i've always been one.

growing up, everyone around me continuously praised me for my achievements. i was so bright. i was a model student. a model sister. a model friend. everything came easily to me. learning things was my favorite passtime. i think i learned too much too soon.
i always was occupied with sports or schoolwork. i didnt have time to breathe, let alone think. then it all stopped. i think around covid was the downfall of my tight knit social circle, and the little grasp i had on reality. i realized i was ugly. i realized i wasn't worth saving. still, i kept going. kept putting my all into things i didn't care about. kept distracting myself so that my brain kept quiet. until it couldn't anymore. passive ideations turned into a very intentional focus. i wanted to die.

things went downhill very quickly. years passed and i still havent gathered the courage to do it. someone passed away recently, and i saw how much the expenses were for the funeral. my parents can't afford that. id feel too sad for my cat.

my whole life, and even death would come as a major inconvenience. im selfish but id rather not put my family through that.

theres two ways out. i man up and finally give myself one last purpose. or i learn how to live.

where do i go from here.

You’re worth it , people can’t tell you that you’re not worthy and you choose the purpose of your life , it will get better friend