Deleted Member 98440
ihatemeletsdie
- Joined
- Dec 18, 2025
- Messages
- 29
- Time Online
- 12h 48s
- Reputation
- 71
i don’t want to feel like i need ppl when i obviously don’t. i crave love and attention even tho i know it can be so wrong if i leave it unmonitored. especially when i’m this depressed and feel like shit.
but im proud of myself for at least not shoving it down other ppl’s throats and dealing with it on my own for the most part.
i feel so dysregulated and all over the place. and honestly i do look at myself from the perspective of other ppl, judging myself way worse than i should.
i feel retarded in every way lmaoooo like bro
it shouldn’t be this hard to feel nor/mal i am trying my best tho
breathing exercises help. but doing tasks like taking care of myself, showers or naps just makes me feel like im avoiding more important shit. so yep i can’t ever relax.
less sleep = cortisolmaxxing = poor appetite = bad eating habits = more acne = feel like shit.
i just don’t wanna “depend” on other ppl all the time — even tho im not tbh. i just feel guilty asf 24/7. no peace for me
texting the ppl i love and reaching out whenever i want to shouldn’t feel like something i need to control or something that needs its frequency to be “fixed”. it feels like i’m being suffocated by my own mind and the only time it shuts up is when i am asleep.
i wish the ppl i want in my life could see that i need them. and i know it’s on me for not reaching out to them and being like “hey, i’d like to receive this from u etc. to feel better rn” but i feel like a massive prick regardless.
can’t help but feel that others don’t want me around as much as i don’t want myself around either.
but im proud of myself for at least not shoving it down other ppl’s throats and dealing with it on my own for the most part.
i feel so dysregulated and all over the place. and honestly i do look at myself from the perspective of other ppl, judging myself way worse than i should.
i feel retarded in every way lmaoooo like bro
it shouldn’t be this hard to feel nor/mal i am trying my best thobreathing exercises help. but doing tasks like taking care of myself, showers or naps just makes me feel like im avoiding more important shit. so yep i can’t ever relax.
less sleep = cortisolmaxxing = poor appetite = bad eating habits = more acne = feel like shit.
i just don’t wanna “depend” on other ppl all the time — even tho im not tbh. i just feel guilty asf 24/7. no peace for me
texting the ppl i love and reaching out whenever i want to shouldn’t feel like something i need to control or something that needs its frequency to be “fixed”. it feels like i’m being suffocated by my own mind and the only time it shuts up is when i am asleep.
i wish the ppl i want in my life could see that i need them. and i know it’s on me for not reaching out to them and being like “hey, i’d like to receive this from u etc. to feel better rn” but i feel like a massive prick regardless.
can’t help but feel that others don’t want me around as much as i don’t want myself around either.