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Been on raw primal diet for 3 months — I CAN NO LONGER WEAR SUNGLASSES!

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May 28, 2025
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Bros…

I’ve been eating nothing but raw liver, unwashed eggs, and unrefrigerated raw milk for three months.

No seasoning. No cooking. No boiling. No regrets.

They told me cooking was a Matrix psyop. That bacteria builds character.

So I went primal. Full send.

At first it was hard. I had the cold sweats, the meat sweats, and something I call “fermentation anxiety.”

But then, things started to change within me.

Initially, my skin became slightly reflective. My pupils dilated permanently.

Time went on and my dog started respecting me more. My neighbor's toddler cried every time I walked past. My aura became carnivorous.

Last week, my Maui Jim sunglasses stopped fitting. I thought I sat on them. But no... MY FACE HAD GROWN! My orbital bones expanded.

I went to the dentist and he said, “Your maxilla’s been doing push-ups.”

I’ve gained 0.5 inches of bone density just by staring at the sun while chewing raw spleen.

Do I get sick? Yes. Almost constantly. But in a way that feels righteous.
Every time I get food poisoning, I come back stronger... like the meat is choosing who’s worthy.

My mom told me to stop. I told her to stop boiling her nutrients.

I’m not only surviving. I’m ascending. One raw spleen at a time.
If you are on this forum and haven't tried the primal diet yet, what are you even doing?

Join me, brothers. Throw your air fryer into the river.
Chew liver under the moonlight. Let your zygos rise.
Let’s build a future where no man boils his food… and every jawline casts a shadow.
 
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Bros…

I’ve been eating nothing but raw liver, unwashed eggs, and unrefrigerated raw milk for three months.

No seasoning. No cooking. No boiling. No regrets.

They told me cooking was a Matrix psyop. That bacteria builds character.

So I went primal. Full send.

At first it was hard. I had the cold sweats, the meat sweats, and something I call “fermentation anxiety.”

But then, things started to change within me.

Initially, my skin became slightly reflective. My pupils dilated permanently.

Time went on and my dog started respecting me more. My neighbor's toddler cried every time I walked past. My aura became carnivorous.

Last week, my Maui Jim sunglasses stopped fitting. I thought I sat on them. But no... MY FACE HAD GROWN! My orbital bones expanded.

I went to the dentist and he said, “Your maxilla’s been doing push-ups.”

I’ve gained 0.5 inches of bone density just by staring at the sun while chewing raw spleen.

Do I get sick? Yes. Almost constantly. But in a way that feels righteous.
Every time I get food poisoning, I come back stronger... like the meat is choosing who’s worthy.

My mom told me to stop. I told her to stop boiling her nutrients.

I’m not only surviving. I’m ascending. One raw spleen at a time.
If you are on this forum and haven't tried the primal diet yet, what are you even doing?

Join me, brothers. Throw your air fryer into the river.
Chew liver under the moonlight. Let your zygos rise.
Let’s build a future where no man boils his food… and every jawline casts a shadow.
I can recognise the ChatGPT accent lol
 
Bros…

I’ve been eating nothing but raw liver, unwashed eggs, and unrefrigerated raw milk for three months.

No seasoning. No cooking. No boiling. No regrets.

They told me cooking was a Matrix psyop. That bacteria builds character.

So I went primal. Full send.

At first it was hard. I had the cold sweats, the meat sweats, and something I call “fermentation anxiety.”

But then, things started to change within me.

Initially, my skin became slightly reflective. My pupils dilated permanently.

Time went on and my dog started respecting me more. My neighbor's toddler cried every time I walked past. My aura became carnivorous.

Last week, my Maui Jim sunglasses stopped fitting. I thought I sat on them. But no... MY FACE HAD GROWN! My orbital bones expanded.

I went to the dentist and he said, “Your maxilla’s been doing push-ups.”

I’ve gained 0.5 inches of bone density just by staring at the sun while chewing raw spleen.

Do I get sick? Yes. Almost constantly. But in a way that feels righteous.
Every time I get food poisoning, I come back stronger... like the meat is choosing who’s worthy.

My mom told me to stop. I told her to stop boiling her nutrients.

I’m not only surviving. I’m ascending. One raw spleen at a time.
If you are on this forum and haven't tried the primal diet yet, what are you even doing?

Join me, brothers. Throw your air fryer into the river.
Chew liver under the moonlight. Let your zygos rise.
Let’s build a future where no man boils his food… and every jawline casts a shadow.
I will never do my air fryer dirty like that
 

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