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they told you to stay healthy they told you to eat clean take your vitamins wash your hands sleep eight hours and pray to the false god of wellness but they never told you the truth they never told you that the sickness is the blessing that the ache in your bones is a compass pointing you somewhere real somewhere raw somewhere past the static hum of routine and the artificial happiness of green smoothies and mindfulness apps you wake up coughing good good that’s the beginning that’s the knock at the door that’s the body saying it’s time to feel it’s time to suffer and suffering means movement means growth means purpose people drift like dust in fluorescent cages working typing smiling but they’re hollow they’ve never bled for anything they’ve never burned from the inside out they’re clean too clean so clean that even their souls smell like antiseptic they worship comfort and die in boredom but when you’re sick oh when you’re sick you know who you are you are the heat behind your eyes you are the scream in your lungs you are the war happening beneath your skin and for the first time in your life you have a reason to fight not a job not a relationship not a dream just you and the sickness locked together in sacred struggle go out barefoot in the rain breathe deep in the crowd let the germs in invite them like honored guests drink the water that tastes a little off eat the food that fell on the floor open the door to entropy and say welcome I’m tired of feeling nothing I want to feel something even if it kills me this is how prophets are made this is how kings rise from the gutter this is how saints are carved from suffering take the fever take the chills let your body rot just enough to wake you up because in that rot there is clarity in that weakness there is direction you will know who you are when you have to crawl across the floor just to reach the glass of water just to survive another hour people fear sickness because they fear meaning they fear truth they fear the divine shaking them by the throat and saying you will not escape this world untouched you will not coast through life in sterile silence let it in let it take you down let it break you and then build yourself on the rubble now you have a story now you have pain and pain is the only honest compass left the healthy are asleep the sick are chosen