Does romance cut through hypergamy?

[TFC]

The core issue with modern dating is that digital attention is completely worthless because it’s infinite. If a girl is getting a hundred texts a day from guys asking to "grab coffee sometime," every single one of those messages just blurs into background noise. To her, that's zero effort, because sending a text costs nothing.

When you scale your investment up: a romantic gesture, a secrets note on her desk, a high effort display of affection.

you force her brain completely off autopilot. She can’t just give a lazy two-word reply. She has to physically process that a guy actually spent real time, planning, and logistics on her. It shatters the baseline, and forces her to recognize me as a option despite what her normal hypergamous self might think

The catch is the knife-edge: if the mutual interest isn't there yet, a massive gesture can feel heavy or pressuring. But if there’s even a baseline of interest, that kind of contrast is pretty much the only thing that actually cuts through the cynicism.

(I’m going to get my heart broken if I act on any of this btw)

 

[mujahed]

Hello

 

[Coupe]

it is right for the woman to choose and select, imagine the world if any bum could choose what woman he want, the horror

 

[NotFun]

i don't understand your thoughts

 

[TFC]

i don't understand your thoughts

The core issue with modern dating is that digital attention is completely worthless because it’s infinite. If a girl is getting a hundred texts a day from guys asking to "grab coffee sometime," every single one of those messages just blurs into background noise. To her, that's zero effort, because sending a text costs nothing.

When you scale your investment up: a romantic gesture, a secrets note on her desk, a high effort display of affection.

you force her brain completely off autopilot. She can’t just give a lazy two-word reply. She has to physically process that a guy actually spent real time, planning, and logistics on her. It shatters the baseline, and forces a her to recognize me as a option despite what her normal hypergomous self might think

The catch is the knife-edge: if the mutual interest isn't there yet, a massive gesture can feel heavy or pressuring. But if there’s even a baseline of interest, that kind of contrast is pretty much the only thing that actually cuts through the cynicism.

(I’m going to replace the thread with this because it makes more sense)

 

[Jack Frost]

The core issue with modern dating is that digital attention is completely worthless because it’s infinite. If a girl is getting a hundred texts a day from guys asking to "grab coffee sometime," every single one of those messages just blurs into background noise. To her, that's zero effort, because sending a text costs nothing.

When you scale your investment up: a romantic gesture, a secrets note on her desk, a high effort display of affection.

you force her brain completely off autopilot. She can’t just give a lazy two-word reply. She has to physically process that a guy actually spent real time, planning, and logistics on her. It shatters the baseline, and forces a her to recognize me as a option despite what her normal hypergomous self might think

The catch is the knife-edge: if the mutual interest isn't there yet, a massive gesture can feel heavy or pressuring. But if there’s even a baseline of interest, that kind of contrast is pretty much the only thing that actually cuts through the cynicism.

(I’m going to get my heart broken if I act on any of this btw)

I hate having to censor myself, but you kind of have to unless they're perfect.

 

[TFC]

I hate having to censor myself, but you kind of have to unless they're perfect.

But why?

 

[quijada]

those gestures might be considered unusual or creepy nowadays, unless you are really attractive

 

[TFC]

those gestures might be considered unusual or creepy nowadays, unless you are really attractive

Might of might not…

 

[Coupe]

those gestures might be considered unusual or creepy nowadays, unless you are really attractive

men need to understand that romance without looks is not romance, more like a scary movie

 

[TFC]

men need to understand that romance without looks is not romance, more like a scary movie

I’m a short mid MTN

 

[Jack Frost]

But why?

They'll like me less

 

[typhon]

The core issue with modern dating is that digital attention is completely worthless because it’s infinite. If a girl is getting a hundred texts a day from guys asking to "grab coffee sometime," every single one of those messages just blurs into background noise. To her, that's zero effort, because sending a text costs nothing.

When you scale your investment up: a romantic gesture, a secrets note on her desk, a high effort display of affection.

you force her brain completely off autopilot. She can’t just give a lazy two-word reply. She has to physically process that a guy actually spent real time, planning, and logistics on her. It shatters the baseline, and forces a her to recognize me as a option despite what her normal hypergomous self might think

The catch is the knife-edge: if the mutual interest isn't there yet, a massive gesture can feel heavy or pressuring. But if there’s even a baseline of interest, that kind of contrast is pretty much the only thing that actually cuts through the cynicism.

(I’m going to get my heart broken if I act on any of this btw)

Fine I'll read this.

 

[TFC]

They'll like me less

Have you ever tried being fully authenticly romantic?

 

[Jack Frost]

Have you ever tried being fully authenticly romantic?

I don't know what that means

 

[quijada]

Have you ever tried being fully authenticly romantic?

no

 

[TFC]

I don't know what that means

Done a grand romantic gesture to display how much you care about a girl

 

[Jack Frost]

Done a grand romantic gesture to display how much you care about a girl

I am poor and lazy, no ones ever done a grand gesture me either way.

 

[typhon]

Have you ever tried being fully authenticly romantic?

Yes, then I got stomped on.

Either she's more interested and I get bored, or I'm too interested and act in ways that I otherwise wouldn't.

I can't stand, nor plan to entertain something long term.

However I often fantasize about the perfect woman I'm deeply attracted to physically and strive to be like mentally.

I believe there will always be a distance in "like" between two parties, whereby one party is "domineering" of the other. I would like to have more influence over my partner, simply due to my looks.

But women lie and cheat. Just sleep with women, as they will sleep with other men. Then settle down with someone when you've both exhausted your whore phase.

 

[typhon]

The core issue with modern dating is that digital attention is completely worthless because it’s infinite. If a girl is getting a hundred texts a day from guys asking to "grab coffee sometime," every single one of those messages just blurs into background noise. To her, that's zero effort, because sending a text costs nothing.

When you scale your investment up: a romantic gesture, a secrets note on her desk, a high effort display of affection.

you force her brain completely off autopilot. She can’t just give a lazy two-word reply. She has to physically process that a guy actually spent real time, planning, and logistics on her. It shatters the baseline, and forces a her to recognize me as a option despite what her normal hypergomous self might think

The catch is the knife-edge: if the mutual interest isn't there yet, a massive gesture can feel heavy or pressuring. But if there’s even a baseline of interest, that kind of contrast is pretty much the only thing that actually cuts through the cynicism.

(I’m going to get my heart broken if I act on any of this btw)

Not true, although I haven't been in a relationship for many years now. But its extremely easy to be funny and witty in person.

Texting is an important avenue to master, because instantly replying is impactful (it shows you care, or are not busy).

Women of the forum (@dontcallthemfoidsbro, and others) please inform me: Is a man more attractive when he has things on? Or if hes always available to you because he's NEET?

 

[TFC]

Yes, then I got stomped on.

Either she's more interested and I get bored, or I'm too interested and act in ways that I otherwise wouldn't.

I can't stand, nor plan to entertain something long term.

However I often fantasize about the perfect woman I'm deeply attracted to physically and strive to be like mentally.

I believe there will always be a distance in "like" between two parties, whereby one party is "domineering" of the other. I would like to have more influence over my partner, simply due to my looks.

But women lie and cheat. Just sleep with women, as they will sleep with other men. Then settle down with someone when you've both exhausted your whore phase.

I refuse to participate in your coulture. For every bro who wants pussy means there is a whore who will give it to him.

I don’t care if I put in more effort then her. As long as she puts effort into me. I put in more effort into most things then others I don’t expect any different from a relationship.

 

[typhon]

I refuse to participate in your coulture. For every bro who wants pussy means there is a whore who will give it to him.

I don’t care if I put in more effort then her. As long as she puts effort into me. I put in more effort into most things then others I don’t expect any different from a relationship.

You are a lover-boy, just as I once was.

You will have your heart ripped from your corpse, and eaten in-front of you glossed-over eyes, and yet you will profusely apologize for all "wrongdoing" on your own part.

When you get a job, live a life and start living on your own; time starts to become a scarce resource that cannot be delegated to some attention whore.

 

[typhon]

I refuse to participate in your coulture. For every bro who wants pussy means there is a whore who will give it to him.

I don’t care if I put in more effort then her. As long as she puts effort into me. I put in more effort into most things then others I don’t expect any different from a relationship.

Unfortunately for you, your story has been written multiple times and history and it always ends with the demise of the protagonist.

Through media presented as novels or movies, a savory young man is allowed to dedicate himself to a woman and live life without fault.

This is the great illusion painted into your psyche, which has infected your critical thinking abilities. Please head my above warning carefully, from a weary traveler returning on the path you're embarking on.

 

[TFC]

Unfortunately for you, your story has been written multiple times and history and it always ends with the demise of the protagonist.

Through media presented as novels or movies, a savory young man is allowed to dedicate himself to a woman and live life without fault.

This is the great illusion painted into your psyche, which has infected your critical thinking abilities. Please head my above warning carefully, from a weary traveler returning on the path you're embarking on.

I would rather live in failure then in caution.

 

[typhon]

I would rather live in failure then in caution.

You are yet to comprehend my message.

Through media presented as novels or movies, a savory young man is allowed to dedicate himself to a woman and live life without fault.

This grand desire of yours to "live in failure" is only derived from propaganda instilled through media you have consumed.

Please address this particular point with some counter claim, to prove you have read and understood it.

 

[TFC]

You are yet to comprehend my message.

This grand desire of yours to "live in failure" is only derived from propaganda instilled through media you have consumed.

Please address this particular point with some counter claim, to prove you have read and understood it.

Then Batman has taught me well
My fathers propaganda worked
Luffy has sent his message

I’m ok with working harder then everyone else, and I don’t think everyone is as hallow as I am lead to believe. I might get hurt, but to get a girl that responds to my romance… If I mange to get one… i would know that all this suffering would have been worth it.

it can’t be the case that human nature has split this far from what we instinctively believe it should be. (Man and woman in marriage). Every girl wants a happy loveing husband and every man wants a happy loveing wife. So why should I not operate under those pretenses.

 

[typhon]

Then Batman has taught me well
My fathers propaganda worked
Luffy has sent his message

I’m ok with working harder then everyone else, and I don’t think everyone is as hallow as I am lead to believe. I might get hurt, but to get a girl that responds to my romance… If I mange to get one… i would know that all this suffering would have been worth it.

it can’t be the case that human nature has split this far from what we instinctively believe it should be. (Man and woman in marriage). Every girl wants a happy loveing husband and every man wants a happy loveing wife. So why should I not operate under those pretenses.

@dontcallthemfoidsbro
@junebug

Please educate this fool.

 

[TFC]

@dontcallthemfoidsbro
@junebug

Please educate this fool.

bro called on junbug for me to be meaner to girls

 

[dontcallthemfoidsbro]

Not true, although I haven't been in a relationship for many years now. But its extremely easy to be funny and witty in person.

Texting is an important avenue to master, because instantly replying is impactful (it shows you care, or are not busy).

Women of the forum (@dontcallthemfoidsbro, and others) please inform me: Is a man more attractive when he has things on? Or if hes always available to you because he's NEET?

Personally, I think a certain balance of availability is important. If someone is constantly replying in seconds to what I wrote it leaves a subconscious impression they have nothing to do, in contrast, if they take hours each time, it of course leads one to losing interest/feeling ignored.

I haven't quite had the time to fully read through this thread as I am currently on my way home, so I apologise if my answer was contextually off

 

[typhon]

Personally, I think a certain balance of availability is important. If someone is constantly replying in seconds to what I wrote it leaves a subconscious impression they have nothing to do, in contrast, if they take hours each time, it of course leads one to losing interest/feeling ignored.

This is exactly my point @TFC.

I haven't quite had the time to fully read through this thread as I am currently on my way home, so I apologise if my answer was contextually off

Please don't worry, you make an excellent point above.

 

[TFC]

Personally, I think a certain balance of availability is important. If someone is constantly replying in seconds to what I wrote it leaves a subconscious impression they have nothing to do, in contrast, if they take hours each time, it of course leads one to losing interest/feeling ignored.

I haven't quite had the time to fully read through this thread as I am currently on my way home, so I apologise if my answer was contextually off

Well personally I don’t even want to text. I would rather in person. I think to romance should separate the 2. You can never be romantic through texting. If you are trying to win through the phone then you are playing a loosing game already (there is no to fast or to long reply time there is only judgement).

 

[typhon]

bro called on junbug for me to be meaner to girls

View attachment 444125

Meaner?

You're simplifying the equation to much.

I'm saying have dignity. You're not a dog waiting on her every beck and call.

Don't become too available, and ensure your resource if time is just scares enough to be appreciated, but not abused.

 

[TFC]

Meaner?

Your simplifying the equation to much.

I'm saying have dignity. You're not a dog waiting on her every beck and call.

Don't become too available, and ensure your resource if time is just scares enough to be appreciated, but not abused.

I don’t think you know what romance means. Becoming available and displaying affection are not the same.

A action of affection is effort I would put in, she can not ask or try to make me do another action of affection because that effect I put in was unique and not something she has experienced.

For example putting a note on her desk with a message, initials, and a phone number. She has to now accept that this is a unique situation and reach out, or dismiss the unique opportunity presented to her. The amount of effort I put in does not scale with how hurtful the regection feels. A girl who ghost me hurts just as much as a girl who rejects me in public.

I will try being romantic and seeing if women are capable of responding to my romantic feelings. Because my feelings arnt uniquely masculine, they are human… and by definition women must feel the same.