Fighting to earn the right to look and feel like you're own biological sex is a very strange feeling

[SevenColorCrystalBall]

"Oh I'll never be a real woman" Ruby you have a uterus thats functional enough to menstruate and XX chromosomes, you wouldn't be a man or soemthing else even if you really wanted to.

 

[nun]

i feel similarly actually. for a whole slew of reasons i wont get into here, but it’s a type of isolation and/or disconnect that is truly rough LOL most people wouldnt understand but i actually felt seen on this forum for the 1st time. crazyy

 

[SevenColorCrystalBall]

i feel similarly actually. for a whole slew of reasons i wont get into here, but it’s a type of isolation and/or disconnect that is truly rough LOL most people wouldnt understand but i actually felt seen on this forum for the 1st time. crazyy

Like your body is purposefully trying to screw you even though its just a sack of meat? Like being physical is holding you back? Like you will never be truly female/male?

 

[nun]

Like your body is purposefully trying to screw you even though its just a sack of meat? Like being physical is holding you back? Like you will never be truly female/male?

it feels like that way for sure. i feel like even if i lost tons of weight, dressed all nice and did tons of makeup— i wouldn’t feel feminine. or even female. but if i wear steel toed boots and flannels and acted more masculine, i wouldn’t feel masculine or male then either. i feel like i struggle with both categories for different reasons. it’s the reason i joined here initially actually

 

[SevenColorCrystalBall]

it feels like that way for sure. i feel like even if i lost tons of weight, dressed all nice and did tons of makeup— i wouldn’t feel feminine. or even female. but if i wear steel toed boots and flannels and acted more masculine, i wouldn’t feel masculine or male then either. i feel like i struggle with both categories for different reasons. it’s the reason i joined here initially actually

Its weird, its like you'll never feel human in general

 

[nun]

Its weird, its like you'll never feel human in general

yes. i feel like i often view my life as somebody observing it rather than actually taking part in it if somebody said i was ugly, i would only take action to fix that part of myself because i feel like i should care. that if it bothers others, it should inherently bother me. but i don’t even really process or understand how to get off of “autopilot”. even when im stressed or happy i feel like im not particularly human in the typical sense

 

[SevenColorCrystalBall]

yes. i feel like i often view my life as somebody observing it rather than actually taking part in it if somebody said i was ugly, i would only take action to fix that part of myself because i feel like i should care. that if it bothers others, it should inherently bother me. but i don’t even really process or understand how to get off of “autopilot”. even when im stressed or happy i feel like im not particularly human in the typical sense

I never thought someone else would have this