I use to be so patience a confident been working out in gym for a year and a half with a smile on my face. Then bang out of fucking no where idk why idk how, I want to look good yesterday, today tired of fucking waiting. I don’t care about money, relationships or any of that my purpose in my life is to look good in the mirror and be happy. I skipped school for 4 fucking months and made slow shitty progress I’m so hyper aware. Never talked to a girl in tired of seeing these Brain dead cells in school living so weirdly like a robot and still end up with girls.
So what I did
Hopped on 400mg at 16 of test weekly and hoped off Reta
And been running that for 1 month and I still hate my fucking self I’m still fat and ugly, I hate fucking eating I’m 2 weeks off Reta. Everday is a dragging battle forcing myself to eat, workout do my skincare so much effort I barley end up getting shit done. Living each crucial day knowing one day I’ll be that person I see myself in my head.