Sometimes I catch myself feeling this heavy, confusing resentment toward women, and it unsettles me. It isn’t anger in the loud, explosive sense more like a quiet pressure in my chest that I don’t know what to do with. I look in the mirror and start pulling apart every feature: my jaw, my overbite, the asymmetry. I convince myself that if I change enough jaw work, maybe rhinoplasty, maybe Accutane later then these feelings would disappear.
