I have horrible social anxiety

[Deleted Member 74478]

I really need help on this, I can’t interact well with people. I’d do anything to be able to talk well with people but I just can’t.
I’m not totally socially inept I do have jobs where I’m forced to talk to people, but my god I can’t make friends, I’m so anxious that they’ll judge me or dislike me. I try to keep quiet and stuff too, but it really hurts me socially.

This is why I got into looksmaxxing but still, I’m very socially inept
I don’t want to waste more years of my life tbh. I’m going to a new school soon and don’t want to ruin everything

 

[.̶.̶.̴ ̸-̶-̴-̴ ̵.̴.̶.̵]

same

 

[Deleted Member 47925]

sucks to suck

 

[Sovvton]

i cant help bc im an extravert

take some gold rep instead

 

[swanneo]

same i cant really help much. id say just fake a more extroverted personality that worked a bit for me. u cant rlly get rid of the thoughts that everyone hates u tho

 

[Superbia]

find online friends is my only solution

idk if this can be overcome

 

[Deleted Member 74478]

find online friends is my only solution

idk if this can be overcome

online friends are fake asf and if your a girl they only want 1 thing.

 

[Superbia]

online friends are fake asf and if your a girl they only want 1 thing.

no they're not, and you can turn them IRL if you live near them

 

[n4evis]

real, been trying to fix it for a long time but its impossible for me

 

[Nenestar]

Sucks. I'm the same. You should socialize as much as possible when you're in the new place -- easiest time to make new friends.

Or you'll end up as a hermit.

 

[Superbia]

if your a girl they only want 1 thing.

try finding female friends

men dont really understand women so its not a good idea to try to befriend them

 

[n4evis]

I really need help on this, I can’t interact well with people. I’d do anything to be able to talk well with people but I just can’t.
I’m not totally socially inept I do have j*bs where I’m forced to talk to people, but my god I can’t make friends, I’m so anxious that they’ll judge me or dislike me. I try to keep quiet and stuff too, but it really hurts me socially.

This is why I got into looksmaxxing but still, I’m very socially inept
I don’t want to waste more years of my life tbh. I’m going to a new school soon and don’t want to ruin everything

I'd say the only things that are sort of helping me rn are meditation and shadow work, because social anxiety often stems from unhealed trauma (esp if it's from your childhood)

 

[我愛羅]

I used to really struggle with social anxiety, I still do haha but it is definitely not as bad as it was before. The way I got over it was a couple of girls started approaching me everyday trying to be my friend and eventually we got close. That may not be likely to happen for you but hopefully it does! Although it was still heavy they helped me because I was comfortable around them. In the end, only you can defeat this internal warfare, there are no tricks but for you to accept that if someone is judging, what does it matter? More than likely no one is judging you anyways, it’s not like you are the center of the world. (Sorry if that sounds mean, but it helps.) most people aren’t paying attention to you and if they are it’s usually out of curiosity and not oh this person is blank blank. Of course there will be who are evil spirited and mentally judge you but why does that matter to you? Do you want to come off as perfect to everyone? Well that’s not possible, accept you for who you are!!! Don’t regret your years not interacting with others!! (this is kind of all over the place sorry.)

 

[Nenestar]

I used to really struggle with social anxiety, I still do haha but it is definitely not as bad as it was before. The way I got over it was a couple of girls started approaching me everyday trying to be my friend and eventually we got close. That may not be likely to happen for you but hopefully it does! Although it was still heavy they helped me because I was comfortable around them. In the end, only you can defeat this internal warfare, there are no tricks but for you to accept that if someone is judging, what does it matter? More than likely no one is judging you anyways, it’s not like you are the center of the world. (Sorry if that sounds mean, but it helps.) most people aren’t paying attention to you and if they are it’s usually out of curiosity and not oh this person is blank blank. Of course there will be who are evil spirited and mentally judge you but why does that matter to you? Do you want to come off as perfect to everyone? Well that’s not possible, accept you for who you are!!! Don’t regret your years not interacting with others!! (this is kind of all over the place sorry.)

Kinda similar for me. I was severely anxious, I even had a panic disorder. But when I got a gf it kinda just went away. Even after the break-up I'm not that anxious anymore.

And yes spotlight effect is real. Almost nobody cares what you're doing, it's mostly just a mental battle.