I think i get attached to easily.

[Schizotypalcel]

I'm guessing it's low self esteem but how do u even get over that in a healthy way?

 

[The cat from The Matrix]

Attached to what exactly

 

[Schizotypalcel]

Attached to what exactly

People, it could be a feeling of infatuation, but it's hard to tell since it's quick and lasts long.

 

[Becky4L]

sounds like limerence

 

[The cat from The Matrix]

People, it could be a feeling of infatuation, but it's hard to tell since it's quick and lasts long.

Even after the person is out ur life?

 

[Schizotypalcel]

sounds like limerence

Yes i thought this myself, but i just don't know how to get over said limerence.

Even after the person is out ur life?

Kinda

 

[The cat from The Matrix]

sounds like limerence

Once long ago I was caught in this mental torture

 

[Schizotypalcel]

Once long ago I was caught in this mental torture

I'm not caught in it now, just a question i was wondering how to get over if it ever insisted to happen again.

 

[The cat from The Matrix]

Yes i thought this myself, but i just don't know how to get over said limerence.

Kinda

Maybe you gotta ask yourself why. Compare the people u get attached to and see what traits they have in common that you can't seem to let go of

 

[Becky4L]

 

[The cat from The Matrix]

I'm not caught in it now, just a question i was wondering how to get over if it ever insisted to happen again.

I don't even think im still out of it to be fair I still have awful dreams

 

[Schizotypalcel]

View attachment 83080

Such a weird thing to feel, it's quite normal ig for some.

In reality it's just low self esteem an missing something that will possibly never come again when in actuality it might come back better.

never understood why i thought like this constantly when in reality i run away from people that show a particular interest in me.

 

[The cat from The Matrix]

never understood why i thought like this constantly when in reality i run away from people that show a particular interest in me.

I tell people this and they think im crazy

 

[Becky4L]

Such a weird thing to feel, it's quite normal ig for some.

In reality it's just low self esteem an missing something that will possibly never come again when in actuality it might come back better.

never understood why i thought like this constantly when in reality i run away from people that show a particular interest in me.

whats your thought pattern like when you begin to like someone

 

[Schizotypalcel]

whats your thought pattern like when you begin to like someone

You've ever read a ratedLTN thread?

Something like that but lesser.

And if u haven't it's just putting them on a pedestal and expecting them to do the same for me instantly.

 

[Deleted Member 60079]

i do the same, I could easily be fooled into marrying a ltb if she just gives me some attention

 

[Becky4L]

You've ever read a ratedLTN thread?

Something like that but lesser.

And if u haven't it's just putting them on a pedestal and expecting them to do the same for me instantly.

yeah i have

So if they dont instantly feel the same for you instantly, what do you do then?

 

[Schizotypalcel]

So if they dont instantly feel the same for you instantly, what do you do then?

Sabotage everything. really the only way to put it.

 

[moggerofhumanity]

I could easily be fooled into marrying a ltb if she just gives me some attention

Is it bad that this is exactly how I am irl?

 

[Becky4L]

Sabotage everything. really the only way to put it.

how often would you say this occurs, like how often would you meet a new person and immediately attach and make a sort of muse out of them

 

[Deleted Member 60079]

Is it bad that this is exactly how I am irl?

yes, u 100% dont even like them, u just like the idea youve created in your head

 

[Schizotypalcel]

how often would you say this occurs, like how often would you meet a new person and immediately attach and make a sort of muse out of them

It's not often. Sounds creepy when u put it like this, a muse i mean.

Like rn it's not a thing that could happen at all, even with new people in my life (i think).

It's just a thing i wanna be prepared for if it happens again.

 

[n4evis]

I'm guessing it's low self esteem but how do u even get over that in a healthy way?

Find the root cause of the problem first. For a lot of people it's because they didn't receive enough love from their parents while growing up

 

[Schizotypalcel]

Find the root cause of the problem first. For a lot of people it's because they didn't receive enough love from their parents while growing up

I was showed love by my family, but i think i grew up so long without trying to show it maybe that it caused a issue of how i express it.

 

[Darkeningstar]

The way as crude as it sounds is to gain (social and relational) experience and to have people to rely on. The more isolated one is, the more it happens

 

[Schizotypalcel]

The more isolated one is, the more it happens

I definitely agree, i think tho i am social and about (not as of recent) i still feel im isolated in some way.

 

[Becky4L]

It's not often. Sounds creepy when u put it like this, a muse i mean.

Like rn it's not a thing that could happen at all, even with new people in my life (i think).

It's just a thing i wanna be prepared for if it happens again.

didnt mean to make it sound like that jfl

is it a thing that could not happen because you made it like that?

 

[Schizotypalcel]

is it a thing that could not happen because you made it like that?

My brain self destructed trying to understand this tbh.

i guess this might be a unanswered question to myself.

 

[Becky4L]

My brain self destructed trying to understand this tbh.

i guess this might be a unanswered question to myself.

maybe if you thought about this it would help you get over this

 

[Darkeningstar]

I definitely agree, i think tho i am social and about (not as of recent) i still feel im isolated in some way.

That's more or less normal, but I don't know you.
ratedltn case is accentuated by the fact that he has no social circle and therefore places importance on casual encounters in clubs (not exactly the right place to lay the foundations of a relationship), whereas the girls he meets have a different situation behind them. This is mainly a male problem, the male is left in 'nature' (society) alone, but nowadays he actually doesn't know how to cope. Don't expect a lot of emotional support or backing if you are male, and don't tell others about your weaknesses (except superficially).

 

[Schizotypalcel]

Don't expect a lot of emotional support or backing if you are male, and don't tell others about your weaknesses

Yah it's just a question that has me pondering.

I'm not expecting a full essay report from someone who obviously doesn't know me it's just good to see if people are going thru the same thing and possibly use their experience and compare it into mine to elaborate it better.

 

[TonyDr]

i do the same, I could easily be fooled into marrying a ltb if she just gives me some attention

80% of men IRL btw

I'm guessing it's low self esteem but how do u even get over that in a healthy way?

Entertaining multiple women at the same time

 

[neymar]

80% of men IRL btw

Entertaining multiple women at the same time

Im obsessed with 3 girls rn

 

[TonyDr]

Im obsessed with 3 girls rn

Negociate a 4some bro tf are you doin

 

[neymar]

Negociate a 4some bro tf are you doin

I cant even get a threesome let alone foursome

 

[TonyDr]

I cant even get a threesome let alone foursome

Skill issues

 

[neymar]

Skill issues

My friends ginger low Mtn skinny bf did it tho over

 

[Kaari]

I'm guessing it's low self esteem but how do u even get over that in a healthy way?

Haven’t read the whole thread, but it sounds like what you’re going through is limerance. Essentially since you have such low self esteem, you start to fixate on her since she’s pretty much your only source of serotonin. From my experience, you will never truly get over that fixation since essentially you were chemically wired over her, but the best thing you can do is cut all contact with them, besides your limerance will only get worse and your obsession will grow if your limerance isn’t reciprocated back. In time you will be ready to move onto someone else.

This is just my experience and what I did to deal with mine by the way, so bare in mind what I said is anecdotal and may not work for you.

 

[Whitepill]

I'm guessing it's low self esteem but how do u even get over that in a healthy way?

Same

 

[Darkeningstar]

Haven’t read the whole thread, but it sounds like what you’re going through is limerance. Essentially since you have such low self esteem, you start to fixate on her since she’s pretty much your only source of serotonin. From my experience, you will never truly get over that fixation since essentially you were chemically wired over her, but the best thing you can do is cut all contact with them, besides your limerance will only get worse and your obsession will grow if your limerance isn’t reciprocated back. In time you will be ready to move onto someone else.

This is just my experience and what I did to deal with mine by the way, so bare in mind what I said is anecdotal and may not work for you.

I don't think it's limerence

 

[Kaari]

I don't think it's limerence

It’s something along the lines of that anyway, I experienced what he’s felt in the past, it’s just my anecdote I guess.

 

[Deleted Member 59374]

I'm guessing it's low self esteem but how do u even get over that in a healthy way?

youre not stone cold