i got bored so i wrote my response to ur qs. i really like this post so im gonna yap and i dont blame u if u dnr
i think you're asking something along the lines of if everything about me can change then what makes me, me?
i also have a million thoughts throughout the day, i spend a lot of time just thinking and not acting. but i'd say you are neither exclusively the person you imagine yourself to be, nor the person you've managed to demonstrate. its more so a process of what you're becoming. in your mind you can explore all these possible versions of yourself, but you become you when you decide which one of those thoughts deserve to become actions.
obviously you didnt choose your starting point (genetics, childhood, family, environment etc.). your desires can feel involuntary, you didnt choose experiences that helped shape your intial understanding of the world. so what can you actually claim? this sort of touches on determinism which i'm not a fan of. sure some beliefs you have may be engrained within you, but you can examine and question them and then decide if you wanna live by them. you might say 'but i didnt invent my capacity for reflection', but the reflection happens through you. again, its the process that is you, rather than the outcome.
with the status thing, there is no universal threshold of success at which a person finally becomes a legitimate human being. you can become more capable without becoming more worthy, more desirable without becoming more 'deserving' of love, acquire things that change your circumstances without acquiring a more 'authentic' identity. and vice versa. the distinction lies partly in what those things mean to you. are you pursuing something cause you find it meaningful or bc you must obtain it so you respect yourself?
with injuries, id say psychologically, you are still you interms of memories and intentions, your body still exists, your narrative still exists too. changing doesnt mean that you become a different person.
love doesnt necessarily work by identifying a set of objectively desirable characteristics and then selecting the person who has them. obviously attraction and compatibility involve characteristics and looks there's no denying. but proximity breeds attraction. love can also develop through familiarity, shared experiences, trust, vulnerability etc. 'but if we change will ppl love us?' there's no guarantee. ppl grow apart, values change, find incompatibilities. even if you were successful, attractive, funny, intelligent, and accomplished, another person's feelings would never be entirely under your control.
as you said, time will tell. i'd say identity isnt something thats frozen or still. identity can be continuous without remaining constant. you can be who you were, are, and will be simultaneously, despite how much you change about yourself.