no amount of ascending or looking good will redeem all those years where you were alone , where you were rejected , no amount of success with women or social events will ever stop you from being insecure , it will feel good momentarily but your mind will always go back to that state of overthinking , socializing will never be effortless for you , you will always feel like the odd one out in your friend group , you will always doubt when people compliment you , your mind is programmed that way now and no amount of positive reinforcements will change it now , you'll have to live with those thoughts in your mind forever , the damage is done