binx
New member
- Joined
- Aug 16, 2023
- Messages
- 8
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- 19
My whole life I have been faced with challenges that inevitably led me to where I am today, which is 99% purely my looks. If I wish good lucking my mental challenges would not matter
I'm neurodivergent/possibly aspie, I was diagnosed with ADHD & anxiety at 10 and took a shit ton of adderall everyday which caused me to have random outbursts in school
I eventually got a 504 plan in 5th grade, and for all of middle school i had 2-3 teachers in all core classes which was horrible, and tbh i wasn't THAT challenged (i have above average intellect) but after some time I started to adjust to the more challenged kids around me and started acting more and more socially inept everyday
despite the fact I had all this shit happening, I had a girlfriend in sixth grade (she was mental & tried to rope when she would come over), we were both mature for our age and both had similar problems early puberty adhd socially awkward and emo, and we went together well.
even though we were in sixth grade, whenever she would come over we would cuddle/make out (sixth grade ew). And being the immature pre teens we were we couldn't keep any secrets and we were reckless, so she started ranting to all of her friends on how we make out all the time. It spread all around the school and teachers over heard it and didnt gaf.
and being the mentally unstable self she is, she missed like 2/3 of the school year to attend a specialized school for kids who have mental problems like she did.
She met a friend who had a piss kink and had orgys at the ripe age of 10
and would text her 24/7 about me and her conversations and send screenshots of things we would talk about. One specific time me and my ex got into a one sided argument over how I said if she was a man I wouldn't date her (???), and sent a screenshot of me saying that to her fucking friend, 2 minutes later got blocked by her and started getting paragraphs of messages from her friend saying shit like:
"OP you are fucking ugly and worthless i dont even know how you got with a girl like (her)"
"me and (her) are going to fuck and marry each other" wtf
and just in general her friend sent paragraph long messages on those types of things and I remember bawling my fucking eyes out, but eventually two hours later i was unblocked and everything was fine
when she broke up with me, i missed a week straight of school; every night I would cry myself to sleep but after a month or so I got over her. I was possibly in the worst mental/physical state at that time
the summer after the breakup i discovered looksmaxxing (not this forum until a year later) and i realized how fucking unlucky I am, literally the only positive is that I got lucky with genetics and 6'1 and still growing while my parents are 5'9 and 5'3
black hair
hyperhydrosis (sweat constantly/sweaty hands)
black eyes
high bf%
prey eyes
jawline never existed
i was copemaxxing bcuz i was 13 and believed my facial structure was still developing and in the future i would be better (3 years later nothing changed facially)
but why am I writing all of this, i'll just get the the point right here:
2 months ago, happy and confident, show up to school wearing skin tight t-shirts to show muscles and enjoy life
one day during gym class, I got partnered up with a girl for an activity (holy shit)
literally a htb my ideal type, same coloring as i have and has ideal features (ideal fogger) + other stuff i wont describe but ifykwim i instantly was attracted to her
as someone who probably is aspie, i am shit at recognizing emotions and signs of attraction/disgust in any way. But I could tell during this activity we were chatty and she was laughing/smiling. I felt happy and felt like I had a shot with her, no I didnt ask her out here and there but I waited until the weekend and then added her on snap.
I texted her and asked her to follow my tiktok, she seemed chill and wanted to continue the conversation for a bit. eventually i went to bed and woke up the next day feeling good.
this is where it all starts crumbling down
for the next two fucking weeks, i texted her daily asking the most basic fucking questions on repeat (favorite music artist/songs etc.). No she did not text me first, no she never sent me snaps first. Every time we interacted I INITIATED THE FUCKING CONVERSATION. I got obsessed with her which led to my downfall, and eventually one day I texted her "hi", and she left me on opened, so i responded "bro", she finally responded "what do you want" and then blocked me before I could respond.
I was blocked for a month, in school her friends would make fun of me and message and send photos of her to me, one of her legit low ltb friends straight out messaged me one day saying "you don't have a chance with (her)". really broke me, but she unblocked me and messaged me and tried to manipulate me to make a fool out of myself then blocked me when it didn't work.
For a few weeks, I was so desperate for her that I would tell her to unblock me straight up, and her friends would record videos of me begging for her to unblock me. She unblocked me one last time, and we had an awkward slow responding conversation over the course of 3 days,
then all of a sudden overnight after not chatting with her for a week she blocked me and I have been blocked since.
I didn't really care because I was talking to another girl who had blocked me also; yes I was talking to TWO at the same time and got blocked by both. heres an screenshot I took of the other girls conversation.
(yes, she is real and i actually did this)
As of right now, the girl i sent the 8 psl chadlite thing or whatever to has me unblocked. But possibly affected me worse than the first.
She unblocked me new years eve, acted really into me and kept spamming me and spam snapping me. Over a week it faded and it got worse.
She is in one of my classes and sits near me, lots of times conversations start and my friend who sits near too talks about me to her constantly saying (are you going to pull up to his house/ do you snap him a lot). And she responds "I DONT SNAP HIM, HE SNAPS ME!! I DONT RESPOND!" verbatim....
She also video called me on snap once showing me and her messages to MY FRIENDS, fucking evil
besides the factor of girls, its boys too
whenever boys sit next to me, with the surface level knowledge all males have of looksmaxxing, because of my horrible facial appearance, i constantly get told I am mouth-breathing with means my jawline is fucking ugly even though i don't even breathe through my mouth ever.
It's not about age either, adults and family members make fun of my appearance too.
I've had orthodontists/dentists say i have a big voice for a small mouth (small palate = ugly)
my own grandma called me a girl because of my long hair
teachers have asked me if im okay because my eyes look "tired" (im wide fucking awake its my UEE / lazy eye)
the worst part is that i've overheard extended family members talking about my appearance in a bad way since i was a kid
in conclusion, im a ltn nd aspie cuck who has no hope for the future
+ i had braces for 3 years and wear a retainer that didn't do shit for my appearance.
if you have any suggestions or tips for my appearance based on my photo tell me im desperate
to the ppl that know me irl fuck off
I'm neurodivergent/possibly aspie, I was diagnosed with ADHD & anxiety at 10 and took a shit ton of adderall everyday which caused me to have random outbursts in school
I eventually got a 504 plan in 5th grade, and for all of middle school i had 2-3 teachers in all core classes which was horrible, and tbh i wasn't THAT challenged (i have above average intellect) but after some time I started to adjust to the more challenged kids around me and started acting more and more socially inept everyday
despite the fact I had all this shit happening, I had a girlfriend in sixth grade (she was mental & tried to rope when she would come over), we were both mature for our age and both had similar problems early puberty adhd socially awkward and emo, and we went together well.
even though we were in sixth grade, whenever she would come over we would cuddle/make out (sixth grade ew). And being the immature pre teens we were we couldn't keep any secrets and we were reckless, so she started ranting to all of her friends on how we make out all the time. It spread all around the school and teachers over heard it and didnt gaf.
and being the mentally unstable self she is, she missed like 2/3 of the school year to attend a specialized school for kids who have mental problems like she did.
She met a friend who had a piss kink and had orgys at the ripe age of 10
and would text her 24/7 about me and her conversations and send screenshots of things we would talk about. One specific time me and my ex got into a one sided argument over how I said if she was a man I wouldn't date her (???), and sent a screenshot of me saying that to her fucking friend, 2 minutes later got blocked by her and started getting paragraphs of messages from her friend saying shit like:"OP you are fucking ugly and worthless i dont even know how you got with a girl like (her)"
"me and (her) are going to fuck and marry each other" wtf
and just in general her friend sent paragraph long messages on those types of things and I remember bawling my fucking eyes out, but eventually two hours later i was unblocked and everything was fine
when she broke up with me, i missed a week straight of school; every night I would cry myself to sleep but after a month or so I got over her. I was possibly in the worst mental/physical state at that time
the summer after the breakup i discovered looksmaxxing (not this forum until a year later) and i realized how fucking unlucky I am, literally the only positive is that I got lucky with genetics and 6'1 and still growing while my parents are 5'9 and 5'3
black hair
hyperhydrosis (sweat constantly/sweaty hands)
black eyes
high bf%
prey eyes
jawline never existed
i was copemaxxing bcuz i was 13 and believed my facial structure was still developing and in the future i would be better (3 years later nothing changed facially)
but why am I writing all of this, i'll just get the the point right here:
2 months ago, happy and confident, show up to school wearing skin tight t-shirts to show muscles and enjoy life
one day during gym class, I got partnered up with a girl for an activity (holy shit)
literally a htb my ideal type, same coloring as i have and has ideal features (ideal fogger) + other stuff i wont describe but ifykwim i instantly was attracted to her
as someone who probably is aspie, i am shit at recognizing emotions and signs of attraction/disgust in any way. But I could tell during this activity we were chatty and she was laughing/smiling. I felt happy and felt like I had a shot with her, no I didnt ask her out here and there but I waited until the weekend and then added her on snap.
I texted her and asked her to follow my tiktok, she seemed chill and wanted to continue the conversation for a bit. eventually i went to bed and woke up the next day feeling good.
this is where it all starts crumbling down
for the next two fucking weeks, i texted her daily asking the most basic fucking questions on repeat (favorite music artist/songs etc.). No she did not text me first, no she never sent me snaps first. Every time we interacted I INITIATED THE FUCKING CONVERSATION. I got obsessed with her which led to my downfall, and eventually one day I texted her "hi", and she left me on opened, so i responded "bro", she finally responded "what do you want" and then blocked me before I could respond.
I was blocked for a month, in school her friends would make fun of me and message and send photos of her to me, one of her legit low ltb friends straight out messaged me one day saying "you don't have a chance with (her)". really broke me, but she unblocked me and messaged me and tried to manipulate me to make a fool out of myself then blocked me when it didn't work.
For a few weeks, I was so desperate for her that I would tell her to unblock me straight up, and her friends would record videos of me begging for her to unblock me. She unblocked me one last time, and we had an awkward slow responding conversation over the course of 3 days,
then all of a sudden overnight after not chatting with her for a week she blocked me and I have been blocked since.
I didn't really care because I was talking to another girl who had blocked me also; yes I was talking to TWO at the same time and got blocked by both. heres an screenshot I took of the other girls conversation.
(yes, she is real and i actually did this)
As of right now, the girl i sent the 8 psl chadlite thing or whatever to has me unblocked. But possibly affected me worse than the first.
She unblocked me new years eve, acted really into me and kept spamming me and spam snapping me. Over a week it faded and it got worse.
She is in one of my classes and sits near me, lots of times conversations start and my friend who sits near too talks about me to her constantly saying (are you going to pull up to his house/ do you snap him a lot). And she responds "I DONT SNAP HIM, HE SNAPS ME!! I DONT RESPOND!" verbatim....
She also video called me on snap once showing me and her messages to MY FRIENDS, fucking evil
besides the factor of girls, its boys too
whenever boys sit next to me, with the surface level knowledge all males have of looksmaxxing, because of my horrible facial appearance, i constantly get told I am mouth-breathing with means my jawline is fucking ugly even though i don't even breathe through my mouth ever.
It's not about age either, adults and family members make fun of my appearance too.
I've had orthodontists/dentists say i have a big voice for a small mouth (small palate = ugly)
my own grandma called me a girl because of my long hair
teachers have asked me if im okay because my eyes look "tired" (im wide fucking awake its my UEE / lazy eye)
the worst part is that i've overheard extended family members talking about my appearance in a bad way since i was a kid
in conclusion, im a ltn nd aspie cuck who has no hope for the future
+ i had braces for 3 years and wear a retainer that didn't do shit for my appearance.
if you have any suggestions or tips for my appearance based on my photo tell me im desperate
to the ppl that know me irl fuck off
