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most frustrating thing in my life

milkjar

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i'm a ND r****d so ofc no one would like my personality, but when I try to force my self to be different nobody likes my personality still, but what makes it worse is not only do they still not like me as a person but they can only perceive me as the false persona I tried to be, like if someone dislikes me i'd want them to dislike the way I genuinely am

but anyways it's this endless exhausting loop of trying to be something I'm not for people to like me and I still don't get the validation I want
 
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The average man doesn't even desire excellence anymore he desires comfort dressed up as "self acceptance." Every failure is framed as "mental health" every shortcoming reframed as "individuality."
 
@piquerism your the only one who I could be my real self around tbh
 
The average man doesn't even desire excellence anymore he desires comfort dressed up as "self acceptance." Every failure is framed as "mental health" every shortcoming reframed as "individuality."
what's your point here?
 
The average man doesn't even desire excellence anymore he desires comfort dressed up as "self acceptance." Every failure is framed as "mental health" every shortcoming reframed as "individuality."
@Kaari who is this
 
alright alright n*****s can y'all stop derailing my thread idc who's circle jerk alt this n***a is
 
bump cause my thread got derailed by these filthy fucking n*****s
 
bump of doom
 
i'm a ND r****d so ofc no one would like my personality, but when I try to force my self to be different nobody likes my personality still, but what makes it worse is not only do they still not like me as a person but they can only perceive me as the false persona I tried to be, like if someone dislikes me i'd want them to dislike the way I genuinely am

but anyways it's this endless exhausting loop of trying to be something I'm not for people to like me and I still don't get the validation I want
I know it sounds cliche as fuck but I genuinely do think being yourself is the best option, idk how to word it but I kinda believe in everything happening for a reason and letting things work out on its own. Like an example is if I tried my best to apply to a school and I still got rejected then I would just assume it was for the best and it wasn’t a right fit. Like obviously you’d want someone to like you for you and I don’t believe a relationship can survive long on a foundation of lies. Or another example is that sometimes I feel like my niche doesn’t attract many guys and I feel the desire to try something different but then I realize that if I were to dress more revealing or go goth or some shit it would be attracting the kinds of guys I wouldn’t want anyway. Also people can sense inauthenticity usually and it’s very offputting
 
I know it sounds cliche as fuck but I genuinely do think being yourself is the best option, idk how to word it but I kinda believe in everything happening for a reason and letting things work out on its own. Like an example is if I tried my best to apply to a school and I still got rejected then I would just assume it was for the best and it wasn’t a right fit. Like obviously you’d want someone to like you for you and I don’t believe a relationship can survive long on a foundation of lies. Or another example is that sometimes I feel like my niche doesn’t attract many guys and I feel the desire to try something different but then I realize that if I were to dress more revealing or go goth or some shit it would be attracting the kinds of guys I wouldn’t want anyway. Also people can sense inauthenticity usually and it’s very offputting
i'm drunk and high rn so uhh I can't really give a proper full response, even though I don't fully agree with you I appreciate it
 
i dont think youre nd tbh youve just isolated yourself for too long
 
i dont think youre nd tbh youve just isolated yourself for too long
maybe maybe not, but what I described is something i've always went through and I hate it
 
maybe maybe not, but what I described is something i've always went through and I hate it
i relate
i think stardust did a good job at putting my thoughts into words tho
you shouldn't pretend to be someone you aren't for the sake of validation
superficial friends don't bring you any real fulfillment at the end of the day
 
i relate
i think stardust did a good job at putting my thoughts into words tho
you shouldn't pretend to be someone you aren't for the sake of validation
superficial friends don't bring you any real fulfillment at the end of the day
well you already know my thoughts on seeking validation being human nature and stuff so I don't need to yap about all that

but yea, I just long to be accepted for who I am as a person, if we're being honest here deep down you know being accepted as you are is one of the most fulfilling things to feel
 
i'm drunk and high rn so uhh I can't really give a proper full response, even though I don't fully agree with you I appreciate it
I’m guessing you think you should basically try more and not just accept? Obviously I think you should try to better yourself but there’s a difference and you can differentiate between like bad habits/traits about yourself that you can work on and things that are just fundamental to your personality or beliefs
 
well you already know my thoughts on seeking validation being human nature and stuff so I don't need to yap about all that

but yea, I just long to be accepted for who I am as a person, if we're being honest here deep down you know being accepted as you are is one of the most fulfilling things to feel
my hack for this is i act as "myself" as possible to scare off people that can't tolerate it. i've made a guy watch two hours of rammstein videos (went home immediately after) to stress test his ND tolerance. it was low so i fucked off and kept doing the same thing and now i have a few close friends but it really took until this year (i turn 20 next week)
 
well you already know my thoughts on seeking validation being human nature and stuff so I don't need to yap about all that

but yea, I just long to be accepted for who I am as a person, if we're being honest here deep down you know being accepted as you are is one of the most fulfilling things to feel
atleast ime when i was surrounded by superficial people with malicious intent i was super unhealthy and just extremely shallow
sure they gave me attention and validation but if i actually needed help, they wouldnt be there for me
all you really need is one or two real friends, it doesn't matter if the rest don't accept you
 
my hack for this is i act as "myself" as possible to scare off people that can't tolerate it.
well this is really what your supposed to do

be your self and it will filter out who wants you for who you are, but it's hard to do when you seek validation so bad your constantly thinking about how you can condition your self to make others like you
 
well this is really what your supposed to do

be your self and it will filter out who wants you for who you are, but it's hard to do when you seek validation so bad your constantly thinking about how you can condition your self to make others like you
i understand, i was like this for a while especially if its someone you really desire to be close to/be your friend. at some point you have to forcefully override it, ive felt physically sick over giving up on being understood by someone. unfortunately true understanding will only come from prolonged vulnerability and contact; seeking validation will get in the way of this in the long term because you'll (even unintentionally) avoid vulnerability. its kind of like being in trouble for something you didnt even do, especially the shame associated with that
 

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