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Story My Attempts Have Failed, Again.

PlayboyDex

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I never thought I'd ever make another thread post on a forum like these again, but it just feels right, and a part of me hopes by me doing this, i jinx it and i do become good-looking,

i know this place is a cesspool, forums like org and here have become dogshit post-june 2023. but regardless, im here to speak

You can check my join date/posts to see im not a larping weirdo, this is the truth

I was once a pretty good looking guy, especially for my niche, the way i dressed, my pheno, all of it, i was at the top of my food chain, and was getting women far out of my self perceived smv.

Long story short, that was 2 years ago now, for the last year, to the month, i have been what id consider fairly unattractive, especially compared to my previous standpoint

Despite this, in fall 2025, when i first came to uni, the BEST looking girl on my entire floor, out of all people, wanted me, out of the multitude of guys who shot their shot and missed, she wanted me.

Now you may ask, "How could that be if you were ugly?"

Well its for two reasons, i was not/am not as ugly as my internal dialogue has been telling me for years, and she was also not as goodlooking as my pestadlized version of her. (STILL WAS BY FAR THE BADDEST GIRL ON MY ENTIRE FLOOR)

The reasoning for my despair despite me being relatively at a similar point of looks as my freshman year of highschool , i feel 100x worse and self consious, for the same reason people right now feel horrible about btc at $71K, but 5 years ago that was the most euphoric moment of BTCs entire life.
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Once you've tasted , experienced, and felt something great, anything after it feels horrible, even if its not "horrible"


The Attempts that failed

Halloween, Christmas break, Spring Break.

Each time i took these events as the moment where i would reascend and become goodlooking again, i would fix my hair and id be back.

Fail after Fail after

FAIL.

The most recent one being spring break, felt like a pump and dump.


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I intially thought "omg im actually gonna be goodlooking again" just to look in the mirror and still feel distain for my reflection.

I go back to uni tmr, i failed again, but ive learned, its never over.
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