NO WAY OUT

[Deleted Member 60441]

U trolling me or

I advise you to be cautious, but you can do it

 

[Jeezy]

Who gives a fuck about friends,
If you mix the baking soda with it you can get a Benz

@twinkdestroyer rep?

 

[Deleted Member 60441]

U trolling me or

Oh don't trust me, I have a bad reputation in here

 

[Schizotypalcel]

19

Yah your life is over, don't quote me ever again.

 

[Night]

Oh don't trust me, I have a bad reputation in here

 

[over0]

Work through ur trauma you probably won't feel any better tho if you've ascended and still aren't satisfied. Some people are hardwired better than others and that's the true blackpill

 

[Deleted Member 60441]

View attachment 163164

They paint me as a monster, strange

 

[Jeezy]

Work through ur trauma you probably won't feel any better tho if you've ascended and still aren't satisfied. Some people are hardwired better than others and that's the true blackpill

Can't ascend if you are depressed that is the truth!

 

[Deleted Member 60441]

ciao ciao

 

[Stardust_]

Hello guys I just joined this forum, I know this probably isn’t the best way to start this but I just want to talk to someone who could understand me and not normies/therapist. Growing up ugly fucking ruined my life. I was a fat kid, not that fat but yeah different from the other girls in my class. Of course you would guess I got bullied and yeah that is partly true, but they did something that was even worse for me. Every time I would speak they simply ignored me or not pay attention to me, it’s like I was that UGLY that they wouldn’t even look at me/waste their time trying to make me feel bad. Though I still didn’t understand the truth, I just thought they were mad at me for something but still I craved human interaction and friends. Then puberty hit, you’re probably thinking: “Well, surely it got better!” Fuck no. I fucking turned into a genetic disaster and I’m not even kidding. I wasn’t fat anymore because I grew taller but my face was indescribable, literally all puberty did for me was making me taller and give me a pair of tits. I was blue pilled at the time and thought that looks wouldn’t matter, at least for friendships. I was wrong. The people that were my friends (just because the teachers kinda forced them to talk to me since nobody else would) stopped talking to me, without even fighting, like, without any reason. Not that they treated me any better since they would make comments about my appearance, even laughing about my smile, it was like seeing me “happy” didn’t matter, all they saw was an ugly face. I also had other friends (neighbors) that didn’t even bother being nice and tried to fight me physically (I beat the shit out of them not larping) and one of them said he wouldn’t even r**e me. I STILL told myself that I would look better, I just needed to grow up even more (obviously didn’t happen but not the point rn) but I’d say the triggering event was my sister telling me we didn’t have the same nose as my mom. I was confused at first, I didn’t even notice that. But when I looked at my mom I realized how different we were and how much more beautiful she was than me. Not just the nose, all the features. I looked at my sister and yeah, the nose was different but she was and still is a fucking Stacy, she looked a lot more like her. This is the time where I started getting into surgeries, I was 12 years old and, spoiler, I didn’t let the nose stuff go until I had surgery for it 7 years later. (2nd spoiler, it wasn’t just the nose)
As I grew up and got into my teens/late teens, shit got even worse. I would just play video games all day every day and yeah even the fucking online friends told me I was ugly. I got diagnosed with schizophrenia, avoidant personality and ocd. My therapist would still tell me it was just some trauma in the family or some shi but in reality it’s because I wasn’t born with a NORMAL, NOT PRETTY, NORMAL face. After years of crying histerically and trying to overdose on psych meds my mom and dad decided I could do surgeries and procedures (like fillers) (mind you they didn’t even pay for them I had to save up sm money). Finally Something changed, I got better features but yeah I also soft maxed. People would talk to me more/ guys started to ask for my insta. I was about to start a normal life until the fucking black pill became main stream. I had approximately 6 reasons more why I’m still chopped. At first I was obsessed with it but I tried to let it go, because everybody would just tell me “You’re a girl, you can get laid as much as u want or find a relationship easily, even with someone much better looking than you” and started dating. It was nice until the guy I was with fucked up really bad I don’t even want to say it because it’s just so embarrassing for him. I didn’t get “traumatized” from this experience tho, even when I was with him I realized I don’t rlly care about romantic relationships or sex (Yes, even from Chad). What I truly crave now is approval, forgetting about my old self and most importantly, friends. I just wanted them to laugh and smile with me but I didn’t even deserve that. If only I had a normal face, not pretty, just normal, my brain wouldn’t be scarred for life. To finish this rant I’m basically inside this loophole again, and I don’t think I’ll ever get out from it.

You’ll be okay hun, I’m here if you ever need to talk

 

[Jeezy]

You’ll be okay hun, I’m here if you ever need to talk

I thought you realized you were low-IQ and were leaving com?

 

[over0]

I thought you realized you were low-IQ and were leaving com?

I need to see this thread wow

 

[Stardust_]

I need to see this thread wow

I never said that wtf is this dude on about

 

[Schizotypalcel]

"Hi guys i have avoidant personality disorder and i just sat here and typed out an essay worth of complete babble and i normally do this especially with a disorder that is aligned to make me not be open about my issues, please look at me and praise me in my discord dms.

Side note, i will talk about suicide and trauma dump on you for the first interactions and you will care for me (it's not another form of lovebombing if you can fix me!)
So please add my discord and make me feel validated because my father isn't home to give me money for the party i'm supposed to go to tonight..."

 

[Jeezy]

I never said that wtf is this dude on about

In several comments you said maybe I should just leave

 

[Jeezy]

I need to see this thread wow

Ill find it and tag u

 

[Deleted Member 76607]

"Hi guys i have avoidant personality disorder and i just sat here and typed out an essay worth of complete babble and i normally do this especially with a disorder that is aligned to make me not be open about my issues, please look at me and praise me in my discord dms.

Side note, i will talk about suicide and trauma dump on you for the first interactions and you will care for me (it's not another form of lovebombing if you can fix me!)
So please add my discord and make me feel validated because my father isn't home to give me money for the party i'm supposed to go to tonight..."

Nailed it, looks like you gave a fuck after all

 

[Schizotypalcel]

Nailed it, looks like you gave a fuck after all

It's weirdo behavior, i gave it a read and just was shocked.

 

[vespertine]

Helullo guys ie juest joinead this forum, ie kenew this probably isn’t teh best way to start this but ie juest want to talk to someonae hwo coold understand mae and not normies/therapist. Growenng up ugly fuckenng ruinead my lief. Ie was a fat kid, not that fat but yeah different from teh othar girls in my class. Of coorsae yoo woold guess ie got bulliead and yeah that is partly true, but they did somethenng that was even worsae for mae. Evey timeam ie woold speak they simply ignoread mae or not pay attention to me, it’s likae ie was that ugly that they wooldn’t even louk at me/wasta their timeam tryenng to makae mae feal bad. Thoogh ie still didn’t understand teh truth, ie juest thooght they weare mad at mae for somethenng but still ie cravead human interaction and friends. Then puberty heit, yoo’are probably thinking: “well, surely it got better!” Fhuck naoh. Ie fuckenng turnead into a genetic disastar and i’m not even kiddenng. Ie wasn’t fat anymoare becausae ie graw tallar but my facae was indescribable, literally awl puberty did for mae was makenng mae tallar and givae mae a pair of tits. Ie was bluae pillead at teh timeam and thooght that louks wooldn’t matter, at least for friendships. Ie was wrong. Teh pweoplele that weare Mah frys (just becausae teh teachers kinde forcead them to talk to mae sincae nobody elsae woold) stoppead talkenng to me, withoot even fighting, like, withoot any reason. Not that they treatead mae any bettar sincae they woold makae comments aboot my appearance, even laughenng aboot my smile, it was likae seeenng mae “happy” didn’t matter, awl they sean was an ugly facae. Ie also had othar friends (neighbors) that didn’t even bothar beenng nicae and triead to fight mae physically (i beat teh aw shit oot of them not larping) and onae of them said hae wooldn’t even r**ae mae. Ie still told myself that ie woold louk better, ie juest naeedead to grow up even nomare (obvioosly didn’t happen but not teh puint rn) but i’d say teh triggerenng event was my sistar tellenng mae wae didn’t havae teh sameam nosae as my nomm. Ie was confusead at first, ie didn’t even noticae that. But hwen ie loukead at my nomm ie realizead how different wae weare and how much nomare beautiful shae was than mae. Not juest teh nose, awl teh featureis. Ie loukead at my sistar and yeah, teh nosae was different but shae was and still is a fuckenng stacy, shae loukead a lot nomare likae huer. This is teh timeam hweare ie startead gettenng into surgeries, ie was 12 years old and, spoiler, ie didn’t let teh nosae stuff go until ie had surgery for it 7 years latar. (2nd spoiler, it wasn’t juest teh nose)
as ie graw up and got into my teens/lata teens, aw shit got even worsae. Ie woold juest pelay video gameis awl day evey day and yeah even teh fuckenng onlinae friends told mae ie was ugly. Ie got diagnosead witht schizophrenia, avoidant pwersonality and ocd. My therapist woold still tell mae it was juest someam traume in teh family or someam shi but in reality it’s becausae ie wasn’t born witht a normal, not pretty, normal facae. Ahtar years of cryenng heisterically and tryenng to overdosae on psych meds my nomm and dad decidead ie coold do surgeris and procedureis (likae fillers) (mind yoo they didn’t even pay for them ie had to savae up sm nomney). Finally somethenng changed, ie got bettar featureis but yeah ie also soft maxead. Pweoplele woold talk to mae nomre/ guys startead to assk for my inste. Ie was aboot to start a normal lief until teh fuckenng black pill becameam main stream. Ie had approximately 6 reasons nomare hwy i’m still choppead. At first ie was obsessead witht it but ie triead to let it go, becausae everybody woold juest tell mae “yoo’are a girl, yoo can get laid as much as u want or find a relationship easily, even witht someonae much bettar loukenng than yoo” and startead datenng. It was nicae until teh guy ie was witht fuckead up really bad ie don’t even want to say it becausae it’s juest so embarrassenng for heim. Ie didn’t get “traumatized” from this experiencae tho, even hwen ie was witht heim ie realizead ie don’t rlly caare aboot romantic relationships or sex (yes, even from chad). Hwat ie truly cravae now is approval, forgettenng aboot my old self and nomst amportantly, friends. Ie juest wantead them to laugh and smilele witht mae but ie didn’t even deservae that. If only ie had a normal face, not pretty, juest normal, my brain wooldn’t buh scarread for lief. To finish this rant i’m basically insidae this loupholele again, and ie don’t think i’ll evar get oot from it.

 

[Gynomaster]

Hello guys I just joined this forum, I know this probably isn’t the best way to start this but I just want to talk to someone who could understand me and not normies/therapist. Growing up ugly fucking ruined my life. I was a fat kid, not that fat but yeah different from the other girls in my class. Of course you would guess I got bullied and yeah that is partly true, but they did something that was even worse for me. Every time I would speak they simply ignored me or not pay attention to me, it’s like I was that UGLY that they wouldn’t even look at me/waste their time trying to make me feel bad. Though I still didn’t understand the truth, I just thought they were mad at me for something but still I craved human interaction and friends. Then puberty hit, you’re probably thinking: “Well, surely it got better!” Fuck no. I fucking turned into a genetic disaster and I’m not even kidding. I wasn’t fat anymore because I grew taller but my face was indescribable, literally all puberty did for me was making me taller and give me a pair of tits. I was blue pilled at the time and thought that looks wouldn’t matter, at least for friendships. I was wrong. The people that were my friends (just because the teachers kinda forced them to talk to me since nobody else would) stopped talking to me, without even fighting, like, without any reason. Not that they treated me any better since they would make comments about my appearance, even laughing about my smile, it was like seeing me “happy” didn’t matter, all they saw was an ugly face. I also had other friends (neighbors) that didn’t even bother being nice and tried to fight me physically (I beat the shit out of them not larping) and one of them said he wouldn’t even r**e me. I STILL told myself that I would look better, I just needed to grow up even more (obviously didn’t happen but not the point rn) but I’d say the triggering event was my sister telling me we didn’t have the same nose as my mom. I was confused at first, I didn’t even notice that. But when I looked at my mom I realized how different we were and how much more beautiful she was than me. Not just the nose, all the features. I looked at my sister and yeah, the nose was different but she was and still is a fucking Stacy, she looked a lot more like her. This is the time where I started getting into surgeries, I was 12 years old and, spoiler, I didn’t let the nose stuff go until I had surgery for it 7 years later. (2nd spoiler, it wasn’t just the nose)
As I grew up and got into my teens/late teens, shit got even worse. I would just play video games all day every day and yeah even the fucking online friends told me I was ugly. I got diagnosed with schizophrenia, avoidant personality and ocd. My therapist would still tell me it was just some trauma in the family or some shi but in reality it’s because I wasn’t born with a NORMAL, NOT PRETTY, NORMAL face. After years of crying histerically and trying to overdose on psych meds my mom and dad decided I could do surgeries and procedures (like fillers) (mind you they didn’t even pay for them I had to save up sm money). Finally Something changed, I got better features but yeah I also soft maxed. People would talk to me more/ guys started to ask for my insta. I was about to start a normal life until the fucking black pill became main stream. I had approximately 6 reasons more why I’m still chopped. At first I was obsessed with it but I tried to let it go, because everybody would just tell me “You’re a girl, you can get laid as much as u want or find a relationship easily, even with someone much better looking than you” and started dating. It was nice until the guy I was with fucked up really bad I don’t even want to say it because it’s just so embarrassing for him. I didn’t get “traumatized” from this experience tho, even when I was with him I realized I don’t rlly care about romantic relationships or sex (Yes, even from Chad). What I truly crave now is approval, forgetting about my old self and most importantly, friends. I just wanted them to laugh and smile with me but I didn’t even deserve that. If only I had a normal face, not pretty, just normal, my brain wouldn’t be scarred for life. To finish this rant I’m basically inside this loophole again, and I don’t think I’ll ever get out from it.

I had no friends too until I got into a fight. Then we became friends (I was 4)
Is your name Teofil?

 

[Hellohello123272]

"Hi guys i have avoidant personality disorder and i just sat here and typed out an essay worth of complete babble and i normally do this especially with a disorder that is aligned to make me not be open about my issues, please look at me and praise me in my discord dms.

Side note, i will talk about suicide and trauma dump on you for the first interactions and you will care for me (it's not another form of lovebombing if you can fix me!)
So please add my discord and make me feel validated because my father isn't home to give me money for the party i'm supposed to go to tonight..."

Holy yap didn’t even read the first sentence

 

[Hellohello123272]

You’ll be okay hun, I’m here if you ever need to talk

Thank you sm

 

[Hellohello123272]

I had no friends too until I got into a fight. Then we became friends (I was 4)
Is your name Teofil?

No why

 

[Deleted Member 60441]

"Hi guys i have avoidant personality disorder and i just sat here and typed out an essay worth of complete babble and i normally do this especially with a disorder that is aligned to make me not be open about my issues, please look at me and praise me in my discord dms.

Side note, i will talk about suicide and trauma dump on you for the first interactions and you will care for me (it's not another form of lovebombing if you can fix me!)
So please add my discord and make me feel validated because my father isn't home to give me money for the party i'm supposed to go to tonight..."

Nah, she seems fine

My word, for what it's worth

 

[Deleted Member 60441]

Nah, she seems fine

My word, for what it's worth

She is Italian, she is ok

 

[Schizotypalcel]

Nah, she seems fine

My word, for what it's worth

People play a role, especially if their plan doesn't work out.

 

[Deleted Member 60441]

People play a role, especially if there plan doesn't work out.

Maybe, but wait before you label her

 

[Hellohello123272]

People play a role, especially if their plan doesn't work out.

What would my plan be

 

[Night]

What would my plan be

you asked the right person

 

[Deleted Member 62079]

Hello guys I just joined this forum, I know this probably isn’t the best way to start this but I just want to talk to someone who could understand me and not normies/therapist. Growing up ugly fucking ruined my life. I was a fat kid, not that fat but yeah different from the other girls in my class. Of course you would guess I got bullied and yeah that is partly true, but they did something that was even worse for me. Every time I would speak they simply ignored me or not pay attention to me, it’s like I was that UGLY that they wouldn’t even look at me/waste their time trying to make me feel bad. Though I still didn’t understand the truth, I just thought they were mad at me for something but still I craved human interaction and friends. Then puberty hit, you’re probably thinking: “Well, surely it got better!” Fuck no. I fucking turned into a genetic disaster and I’m not even kidding. I wasn’t fat anymore because I grew taller but my face was indescribable, literally all puberty did for me was making me taller and give me a pair of tits. I was blue pilled at the time and thought that looks wouldn’t matter, at least for friendships. I was wrong. The people that were my friends (just because the teachers kinda forced them to talk to me since nobody else would) stopped talking to me, without even fighting, like, without any reason. Not that they treated me any better since they would make comments about my appearance, even laughing about my smile, it was like seeing me “happy” didn’t matter, all they saw was an ugly face. I also had other friends (neighbors) that didn’t even bother being nice and tried to fight me physically (I beat the shit out of them not larping) and one of them said he wouldn’t even r**e me. I STILL told myself that I would look better, I just needed to grow up even more (obviously didn’t happen but not the point rn) but I’d say the triggering event was my sister telling me we didn’t have the same nose as my mom. I was confused at first, I didn’t even notice that. But when I looked at my mom I realized how different we were and how much more beautiful she was than me. Not just the nose, all the features. I looked at my sister and yeah, the nose was different but she was and still is a fucking Stacy, she looked a lot more like her. This is the time where I started getting into surgeries, I was 12 years old and, spoiler, I didn’t let the nose stuff go until I had surgery for it 7 years later. (2nd spoiler, it wasn’t just the nose)
As I grew up and got into my teens/late teens, shit got even worse. I would just play video games all day every day and yeah even the fucking online friends told me I was ugly. I got diagnosed with schizophrenia, avoidant personality and ocd. My therapist would still tell me it was just some trauma in the family or some shi but in reality it’s because I wasn’t born with a NORMAL, NOT PRETTY, NORMAL face. After years of crying histerically and trying to overdose on psych meds my mom and dad decided I could do surgeries and procedures (like fillers) (mind you they didn’t even pay for them I had to save up sm money). Finally Something changed, I got better features but yeah I also soft maxed. People would talk to me more/ guys started to ask for my insta. I was about to start a normal life until the fucking black pill became main stream. I had approximately 6 reasons more why I’m still chopped. At first I was obsessed with it but I tried to let it go, because everybody would just tell me “You’re a girl, you can get laid as much as u want or find a relationship easily, even with someone much better looking than you” and started dating. It was nice until the guy I was with fucked up really bad I don’t even want to say it because it’s just so embarrassing for him. I didn’t get “traumatized” from this experience tho, even when I was with him I realized I don’t rlly care about romantic relationships or sex (Yes, even from Chad). What I truly crave now is approval, forgetting about my old self and most importantly, friends. I just wanted them to laugh and smile with me but I didn’t even deserve that. If only I had a normal face, not pretty, just normal, my brain wouldn’t be scarred for life. To finish this rant I’m basically inside this loophole again, and I don’t think I’ll ever get out from it.

Holy essay. Summarise please

 

[Night]

Holy essay. Summarise please

@recai summarised it in like 3 different languages

 

[Schizotypalcel]

What would my plan be

You are depraved, you don't want friendship you want attention. Relationships don't fulfil this expectation cause it takes two to create a scenario. You want a therapist with a one-sided infatuation for you. Approval in the context of friendship says it all, if all of this is true you need to find it in yourself to find that approval not live by others giving you that validation or that loop hole will stay consistent.

 

[Deleted Member 60441]

Holy essay. Summarise please

She is a girl
She was fat, she was ugly, she was bullied, she had surgery , she had a boyfriend or something, she discovered blackpill and got back into the loop

+ ocd and schizo

 

[Hellohello123272]

You are depraved, you don't want friendship you want attention. Relationships don't fulfil this expectation cause it takes two to create a scenario. You want a therapist with a one-sided infatuation for you. Approval in the context of friendship says it all, if all of this is true you need to find it in yourself to find that approval not live by others giving you that validation or that loop hole will stay consistent.

“Approval” as in making me feel like I’m enough plus I’m not saying I want a fucking boyfriend or whatever I said I just wanted friends

 

[Schizotypalcel]

“Approval” as in making me feel like I’m enough plus I’m not saying I want a fucking boyfriend or whatever I said I just wanted friends

are you low iq?

Approval in the context of friendship says it all

you need to find it in yourself to find that approval not live by others giving you that validation or that loop hole will stay consistent.

“Approval” as in making me feel like I’m enough

You want a therapist with a one-sided infatuation for you.

 

[recai]

@recai summarised it in like 3 different languages

you wanr kurdish one as well?

 

[Hellohello123272]

are you low iq?

No I’m saying I just wanted friends because I lived it like ppl would not be my friend cuz I was ugly did u even read

 

[Deleted Member 62079]

Hello guys I just joined this forum, I know this probably isn’t the best way to start this but I just want to talk to someone who could understand me and not normies/therapist. Growing up ugly fucking ruined my life. I was a fat kid, not that fat but yeah different from the other girls in my class. Of course you would guess I got bullied and yeah that is partly true, but they did something that was even worse for me. Every time I would speak they simply ignored me or not pay attention to me, it’s like I was that UGLY that they wouldn’t even look at me/waste their time trying to make me feel bad. Though I still didn’t understand the truth, I just thought they were mad at me for something but still I craved human interaction and friends. Then puberty hit, you’re probably thinking: “Well, surely it got better!” Fuck no. I fucking turned into a genetic disaster and I’m not even kidding. I wasn’t fat anymore because I grew taller but my face was indescribable, literally all puberty did for me was making me taller and give me a pair of tits. I was blue pilled at the time and thought that looks wouldn’t matter, at least for friendships. I was wrong. The people that were my friends (just because the teachers kinda forced them to talk to me since nobody else would) stopped talking to me, without even fighting, like, without any reason. Not that they treated me any better since they would make comments about my appearance, even laughing about my smile, it was like seeing me “happy” didn’t matter, all they saw was an ugly face. I also had other friends (neighbors) that didn’t even bother being nice and tried to fight me physically (I beat the shit out of them not larping) and one of them said he wouldn’t even r**e me. I STILL told myself that I would look better, I just needed to grow up even more (obviously didn’t happen but not the point rn) but I’d say the triggering event was my sister telling me we didn’t have the same nose as my mom. I was confused at first, I didn’t even notice that. But when I looked at my mom I realized how different we were and how much more beautiful she was than me. Not just the nose, all the features. I looked at my sister and yeah, the nose was different but she was and still is a fucking Stacy, she looked a lot more like her. This is the time where I started getting into surgeries, I was 12 years old and, spoiler, I didn’t let the nose stuff go until I had surgery for it 7 years later. (2nd spoiler, it wasn’t just the nose)
As I grew up and got into my teens/late teens, shit got even worse. I would just play video games all day every day and yeah even the fucking online friends told me I was ugly. I got diagnosed with schizophrenia, avoidant personality and ocd. My therapist would still tell me it was just some trauma in the family or some shi but in reality it’s because I wasn’t born with a NORMAL, NOT PRETTY, NORMAL face. After years of crying histerically and trying to overdose on psych meds my mom and dad decided I could do surgeries and procedures (like fillers) (mind you they didn’t even pay for them I had to save up sm money). Finally Something changed, I got better features but yeah I also soft maxed. People would talk to me more/ guys started to ask for my insta. I was about to start a normal life until the fucking black pill became main stream. I had approximately 6 reasons more why I’m still chopped. At first I was obsessed with it but I tried to let it go, because everybody would just tell me “You’re a girl, you can get laid as much as u want or find a relationship easily, even with someone much better looking than you” and started dating. It was nice until the guy I was with fucked up really bad I don’t even want to say it because it’s just so embarrassing for him. I didn’t get “traumatized” from this experience tho, even when I was with him I realized I don’t rlly care about romantic relationships or sex (Yes, even from Chad). What I truly crave now is approval, forgetting about my old self and most importantly, friends. I just wanted them to laugh and smile with me but I didn’t even deserve that. If only I had a normal face, not pretty, just normal, my brain wouldn’t be scarred for life. To finish this rant I’m basically inside this loophole again, and I don’t think I’ll ever get out from it.

Nvm I read it all. Brutal stuff

Seems to me you want attention, the attention and validation you never got growing up. Filler didn’t fix the emptiness nor did a relationship. I feel like you’re chasing approval rather than self respect and until you face that head on, no amount of looksmaxxing will feel enough. (I doubt you’ll reach lite)

 

[Gynomaster]

Huzz huzz, it's okay

 

[Hellohello123272]

Nvm I read it all. Brutal stuff

Seems to me you want attention, the attention and validation you never got growing up. Filler didn’t fix the emptiness nor did a relationship. I feel like you’re chasing approval rather than self respect and until you face that head on, no amount of looksmaxxing will feel enough, I doubt you’ll reach lite. You even said not even getting chad was enough.

Yeah cuz I thought a relationship would fix me but I don’t even want it

 

[Hellohello123272]

But thx

Yeah cuz I thought a relationship would fix me but I don’t even want it

 

[Deleted Member 62079]

Yeah cuz I thought a relationship would fix me but I don’t even want it

Do you hate the way you look rn? Is it due to you comparing yourself? Anyone sub stacylite/chadlite are gonna be miserable if they’re constantly comparing themselves everyday to others

 

[Hellohello123272]

Do you hate the way you look rn? Is it due to you comparing yourself? Anyone sub stacylite/chadlite are gonna be miserable if they’re constantly comparing themselves everyday to others

I don’t really compare myself tbh, but yeah I would like to reach htb

 

[Deleted Member 62079]

I don’t really compare myself tbh, but yeah I would like to reach htb

Reaching htb won’t do much for ya trust me. It doesn’t fix all your problems if you’re ND. Take my word for it

It gives you more attention yes, but that doesn’t give you as much of a high as you think it does

 

[Hellohello123272]

Reaching htb won’t do much for ya trust me. It doesn’t fix all your problems if you’re ND. Take my word for it

It gives you more attention yes, but that doesn’t give you as much of a high as you think it does

Well yeah you’re right but I also wanna look in the mirror and feel happy

 

[Dean]

Hello guys I just joined this forum, I know this probably isn’t the best way to start this but I just want to talk to someone who could understand me and not normies/therapist. Growing up ugly fucking ruined my life. I was a fat kid, not that fat but yeah different from the other girls in my class. Of course you would guess I got bullied and yeah that is partly true, but they did something that was even worse for me. Every time I would speak they simply ignored me or not pay attention to me, it’s like I was that UGLY that they wouldn’t even look at me/waste their time trying to make me feel bad. Though I still didn’t understand the truth, I just thought they were mad at me for something but still I craved human interaction and friends. Then puberty hit, you’re probably thinking: “Well, surely it got better!” Fuck no. I fucking turned into a genetic disaster and I’m not even kidding. I wasn’t fat anymore because I grew taller but my face was indescribable, literally all puberty did for me was making me taller and give me a pair of tits. I was blue pilled at the time and thought that looks wouldn’t matter, at least for friendships. I was wrong. The people that were my friends (just because the teachers kinda forced them to talk to me since nobody else would) stopped talking to me, without even fighting, like, without any reason. Not that they treated me any better since they would make comments about my appearance, even laughing about my smile, it was like seeing me “happy” didn’t matter, all they saw was an ugly face. I also had other friends (neighbors) that didn’t even bother being nice and tried to fight me physically (I beat the shit out of them not larping) and one of them said he wouldn’t even r**e me. I STILL told myself that I would look better, I just needed to grow up even more (obviously didn’t happen but not the point rn) but I’d say the triggering event was my sister telling me we didn’t have the same nose as my mom. I was confused at first, I didn’t even notice that. But when I looked at my mom I realized how different we were and how much more beautiful she was than me. Not just the nose, all the features. I looked at my sister and yeah, the nose was different but she was and still is a fucking Stacy, she looked a lot more like her. This is the time where I started getting into surgeries, I was 12 years old and, spoiler, I didn’t let the nose stuff go until I had surgery for it 7 years later. (2nd spoiler, it wasn’t just the nose)
As I grew up and got into my teens/late teens, shit got even worse. I would just play video games all day every day and yeah even the fucking online friends told me I was ugly. I got diagnosed with schizophrenia, avoidant personality and ocd. My therapist would still tell me it was just some trauma in the family or some shi but in reality it’s because I wasn’t born with a NORMAL, NOT PRETTY, NORMAL face. After years of crying histerically and trying to overdose on psych meds my mom and dad decided I could do surgeries and procedures (like fillers) (mind you they didn’t even pay for them I had to save up sm money). Finally Something changed, I got better features but yeah I also soft maxed. People would talk to me more/ guys started to ask for my insta. I was about to start a normal life until the fucking black pill became main stream. I had approximately 6 reasons more why I’m still chopped. At first I was obsessed with it but I tried to let it go, because everybody would just tell me “You’re a girl, you can get laid as much as u want or find a relationship easily, even with someone much better looking than you” and started dating. It was nice until the guy I was with fucked up really bad I don’t even want to say it because it’s just so embarrassing for him. I didn’t get “traumatized” from this experience tho, even when I was with him I realized I don’t rlly care about romantic relationships or sex (Yes, even from Chad). What I truly crave now is approval, forgetting about my old self and most importantly, friends. I just wanted them to laugh and smile with me but I didn’t even deserve that. If only I had a normal face, not pretty, just normal, my brain wouldn’t be scarred for life. To finish this rant I’m basically inside this loophole again, and I don’t think I’ll ever get out from it.

welcome @Mathylde and thanks for sharing your story