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Seriously DTM 🤣✌️

nervous

mid tier nothing
Established
Joined
Feb 27, 2026
Messages
588
Online time
4d 15h
Reputation
1,860
Every morning that I wake up brings new challenges. Sometimes it feels like I’ve been bashed on the head with tung tung tung sahurs wooden bat. Other times, I’m excited to discover what lies in store for me today.

Truly like gambling. But sometimes you receive a message so legendary it makes your day.


Have you ever looked at someone and wondered what was going on inside their head?
Unfortunately, I cannot answer that question without seeing a lot of extra brain fluff or memories I didn’t want to be aware of. But when someone makes their memories so easily available, it’s hard to sit back and not comment on it.

Let’s annotate this with me.



“I have a tempting offer for you, little swan

Ummmm, recently something has probably killed what little conscience I had left
A woman, an ex, killed herself right in front of me. She wanted my cock (“I don’t know if it’d all fit in my mouth, it’s so veiny and big blah blah” but anyway… she was a glazer and suicidal, not exactly arousing), she hated me, but she wanted to fuck me before ending her sad life
I put people at ease, even if it’s in eerie ways. Hatred is part of that


Let’s get to the point.
Your feigned innocence is hot

We both know how kinky you are
So, if you want, secretly, whenever you’re horny, I’m at your disposal (or you’re at mine). No attachment, I just want to please you and... me too. I would be pretty rough, though.
if you accept, I’ll give you a big surprise, a big reward… otherwise, well… never mind. I’ve got ways (other people) to kill boredom, as you’ll have noticed

The negative feelings you have towards me would increase the amplitude of your arousal. You could feel like the slut every woman wants to be without being judged for it

I won’t give you an immediate deadline. It’s your choice
Report me or do whatever you like, in the meantime

Good luck with your life, anyway”
1777059625781.webp


Tsk tsk tsk. 15 suggestions? Yikes!
Grammarly is already suggesting edits, and I must say it really hurts to hit the dismiss button. You’re missing a few commas there, bud.

With a great start comes “Tempting offer.” I could already feel my skin start to shrivel up. Unfortunately, I don’t believe tempting is a good word to use in this scenario.

Let’s find you some antonyms instead to broaden your English knowledge.
DISSAPOINTING
POOR
REPELLENT/REPULSIVE OFFER
UNINVITING PROPOSAL
DETERRANT

All comes to mind. Let’s proceed.


“A woman, an ex, killed herself right in front of me.”

1777059625810.webp


Holy shit, my condolences. I’d recommend you get some therapy instead of alting on an internet forum.

“She wanted my cock (“I don’t know if it’d all fit in my mouth, it’s so veiny and big blah blah”
Wait…
Hold up…..
Threw a fun fact in there, didn’t ya? Typically, you need a good transition phrase before dropping in a “truth bomb” of that capacity. I probably would have segwayed into discussing how you’ve been doing recently.
Obviously quite poorly. There are plenty of internet resources at your disposal if you’re capable of finding niche internet forums *smiley angel*
I’ll recommend this source for future reference!

Fuck I got shivers though. You must be really manly to describe yourself that way. I’m feeling like Andrew Tate's aura. It makes me think of a bald man with a really big belly.

“but anyway… she was a glazer and suicidal, not exactly arousing), she hated me, but she wanted to fuck me before ending her sad life”

OHhhhhhhh I understand it now, was anyway your transition? Fuck that’s wild. I feel like I’m reading some filthy AO3 fanfiction right now.

I like how you threw in the literary device of imagery. I’m almost picturing one of snow white’s dwarves fantasizing about a princess. I also think it’s a little insensitive in 2026 to write fanfictions including a girl killing herself. It kind of pushes the outdated damsel in distress plot. I’m sure you could come up with a better way to gain sympathy, instead of making it seem like you’re getting off on the thought of a woman wanting you so badly she will go to death and beyond to have you.

“I put people at ease, even if it’s in eerie ways. Hatred is part of that”
I don’t feel very at ease right now, so your best interest would be in keeping your story and behavior consistent. The hatred part is also a bit of a stretch, I think nauseating might be more proper.

Skipping past a sentence to eliminate redundancy, we get to
“Your feigned innocence is hot”
homelander-disappointed.gif

Thanks, I guess.

“We both know how kinky you are”
I can assure you that you don’t dear. Try again?

“So, if you want, secretly, whenever you’re horny, I’m at your disposal (or you’re at mine). No attachment, I just want to please you and... me too. I would be pretty rough, though.”

Oops. Sorry about the secret part. Quite a few people have shared a laugh already.
Those asexual girls reallllyy be freaks right?? I bet another one of your fantasies would be getting freaky with a monastery sister, or even better, a mime. This whole thing is framed to make it seem like it’s my idea, but honestly, it’s kind of reeking of desperation. I expect better from a self-proclaimed man whore yk?

“if you accept, I’ll give you a big surprise, a big reward…”
1777059625857.webp

“otherwise, well… never mind.”
Yeah, sorry, unfortunately, I’m going to have to pass on that one.

“I’ve got ways (other people) to kill boredom, as you’ll have noticed”
Uhhh, I couldn’t care less what you do in your free time. Don’t think I particularly kept up to date with all of your Discord kitten rendezvous. But like cute! You have an e cuck chair lined up.


“The negative feelings you have towards me would increase the amplitude of your arousal. You could feel like the slut every woman wants to be without being judged for it”

Hmm, surprisingly on point with the negative feelings. Let's see if your “good read” continues.

Oh, wait, stop right there. Why would I want some creepy old man to boss me around? I have a loving partner with whom I spend time every single day. I think if I wanted to whore around, it wouldn’t take too much convincing. Just the whole internet aspect gets in the way. But I imagine that for a cripple, this is the only way you can get real play. I almost feel sorry for you.

“I won’t give you an immediate deadline. It’s your choice”
Aweeeeeeeeee this is so sweet! I think my answer is pretty clearly check that Google Calendar date off as a NEVER. Since I’m courteous enough to respond quickly, I think it’s a good idea to leave me alone.

Yawnnnnnn I’m a little tired after all of that. My ribs hurt from laughing.

In conclusion, he’s all yours @Duchesse @necrotic

Other potentially interested readers. @tuberculosisinmybal
@Randomized @emo kid clutching @pompompurino 💀💀💀
 
Last edited:
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Every morning that I wake up brings new challenges. Sometimes it feels like I’ve been bashed on the head with tung tung tung sahurs wooden bat. Other times, I’m excited to discover what lies in store for me today.
View attachment 337558
Truly like gambling. But sometimes you receive a message so legendary it makes your day.


Have you ever looked at someone and wondered what was going on inside their head?
Unfortunately, I cannot answer that question without seeing a lot of extra brain fluff or memories I didn’t want to be aware of. But when someone makes their memories so easily available, it’s hard to sit back and not comment on it.

Let’s annotate this with me.



“I have a tempting offer for you, little swan

Ummmm, recently something has probably killed what little conscience I had left
A woman, an ex, killed herself right in front of me. She wanted my cock (“I don’t know if it’d all fit in my mouth, it’s so veiny and big blah blah” but anyway… she was a glazer and suicidal, not exactly arousing), she hated me, but she wanted to fuck me before ending her sad life
I put people at ease, even if it’s in eerie ways. Hatred is part of that


Let’s get to the point.
Your feigned innocence is hot

We both know how kinky you are
So, if you want, secretly, whenever you’re horny, I’m at your disposal (or you’re at mine). No attachment, I just want to please you and... me too. I would be pretty rough, though.
if you accept, I’ll give you a big surprise, a big reward… otherwise, well… never mind. I’ve got ways (other people) to kill boredom, as you’ll have noticed

The negative feelings you have towards me would increase the amplitude of your arousal. You could feel like the slut every woman wants to be without being judged for it

I won’t give you an immediate deadline. It’s your choice
Report me or do whatever you like, in the meantime

Good luck with your life, anyway”
View attachment 337548

Tsk tsk tsk. 15 suggestions? Yikes!
Grammarly is already suggesting edits, and I must say it really hurts to hit the dismiss button. You’re missing a few commas there, bud.

With a great start comes “Tempting offer.” I could already feel my skin start to shrivel up. Unfortunately, I don’t believe tempting is a good word to use in this scenario.

Let’s find you some antonyms instead to broaden your English knowledge.
DISSAPOINTING
POOR
REPELLENT/REPULSIVE OFFER
UNINVITING PROPOSAL
DETERRANT

All comes to mind. Let’s proceed.


“A woman, an ex, killed herself right in front of me.”

View attachment 337549

Holy shit, my condolences. I’d recommend you get some therapy instead of alting on an internet forum.

“She wanted my cock (“I don’t know if it’d all fit in my mouth, it’s so veiny and big blah blah”
Wait…
Hold up…..
Threw a fun fact in there, didn’t ya? Typically, you need a good transition phrase before dropping in a “truth bomb” of that capacity. I probably would have segwayed into discussing how you’ve been doing recently.
Obviously quite poorly. There are plenty of internet resources at your disposal if you’re capable of finding niche internet forums *smiley angel*
I’ll recommend this source for future reference!

Fuck I got shivers though. You must be really manly to describe yourself that way. I’m feeling like Andrew Tate's aura. It makes me think of a bald man with a really big belly.

“but anyway… she was a glazer and suicidal, not exactly arousing), she hated me, but she wanted to fuck me before ending her sad life”

OHhhhhhhh I understand it now, was anyway your transition? Fuck that’s wild. I feel like I’m reading some filthy AO3 fanfiction right now.

I like how you threw in the literary device of imagery. I’m almost picturing one of snow white’s dwarves fantasizing about a princess. I also think it’s a little insensitive in 2026 to write fanfictions including a girl killing herself. It kind of pushes the outdated damsel in distress plot. I’m sure you could come up with a better way to gain sympathy, instead of making it seem like you’re getting off on the thought of a woman wanting you so badly she will go to death and beyond to have you.

“I put people at ease, even if it’s in eerie ways. Hatred is part of that”
I don’t feel very at ease right now, so your best interest would be in keeping your story and behavior consistent. The hatred part is also a bit of a stretch, I think nauseating might be more proper.

Skipping past a sentence to eliminate redundancy, we get to
“Your feigned innocence is hot”
homelander-disappointed.gif

Thanks, I guess.

“We both know how kinky you are”
I can assure you that you don’t dear. Try again?

“So, if you want, secretly, whenever you’re horny, I’m at your disposal (or you’re at mine). No attachment, I just want to please you and... me too. I would be pretty rough, though.”

Oops. Sorry about the secret part. Quite a few people have shared a laugh already.
Those asexual girls reallllyy be freaks right?? I bet another one of your fantasies would be getting freaky with a monastery sister, or even better, a mime. This whole thing is framed to make it seem like it’s my idea, but honestly, it’s kind of reeking of desperation. I expect better from a self-proclaimed man whore yk?

“if you accept, I’ll give you a big surprise, a big reward…”
View attachment 337550
“otherwise, well… never mind.”
Yeah, sorry, unfortunately, I’m going to have to pass on that one.

“I’ve got ways (other people) to kill boredom, as you’ll have noticed”
Uhhh, I couldn’t care less what you do in your free time. Don’t think I particularly kept up to date with all of your Discord kitten rendezvous. But like cute! You have an e cuck chair lined up.


“The negative feelings you have towards me would increase the amplitude of your arousal. You could feel like the slut every woman wants to be without being judged for it”

Hmm, surprisingly on point with the negative feelings. Let's see if your “good read” continues.

Oh, wait, stop right there. Why would I want some creepy old man to boss me around? I have a loving partner with whom I spend time every single day. I think if I wanted to whore around, it wouldn’t take too much convincing. Just the whole internet aspect gets in the way. But I imagine that for a cripple, this is the only way you can get real play. I almost feel sorry for you.

“I won’t give you an immediate deadline. It’s your choice”
Aweeeeeeeeee this is so sweet! I think my answer is pretty clearly check that Google Calendar date off as a NEVER. Since I’m courteous enough to respond quickly, I think it’s a good idea to leave me alone.

Yawnnnnnn I’m a little tired after all of that. My ribs hurt from laughing.

In conclusion, he’s all yours @Duchesse @

Other potentially interested readers. @tuberculosisinmybal @Randomized @emo kid clutching @pompompurino 💀💀💀

i cant read but yeah
 
Every morning that I wake up brings new challenges. Sometimes it feels like I’ve been bashed on the head with tung tung tung sahurs wooden bat. Other times, I’m excited to discover what lies in store for me today.
View attachment 337558
Truly like gambling. But sometimes you receive a message so legendary it makes your day.


Have you ever looked at someone and wondered what was going on inside their head?
Unfortunately, I cannot answer that question without seeing a lot of extra brain fluff or memories I didn’t want to be aware of. But when someone makes their memories so easily available, it’s hard to sit back and not comment on it.

Let’s annotate this with me.



“I have a tempting offer for you, little swan

Ummmm, recently something has probably killed what little conscience I had left
A woman, an ex, killed herself right in front of me. She wanted my cock (“I don’t know if it’d all fit in my mouth, it’s so veiny and big blah blah” but anyway… she was a glazer and suicidal, not exactly arousing), she hated me, but she wanted to fuck me before ending her sad life
I put people at ease, even if it’s in eerie ways. Hatred is part of that


Let’s get to the point.
Your feigned innocence is hot

We both know how kinky you are
So, if you want, secretly, whenever you’re horny, I’m at your disposal (or you’re at mine). No attachment, I just want to please you and... me too. I would be pretty rough, though.
if you accept, I’ll give you a big surprise, a big reward… otherwise, well… never mind. I’ve got ways (other people) to kill boredom, as you’ll have noticed

The negative feelings you have towards me would increase the amplitude of your arousal. You could feel like the slut every woman wants to be without being judged for it

I won’t give you an immediate deadline. It’s your choice
Report me or do whatever you like, in the meantime

Good luck with your life, anyway”
View attachment 337548

Tsk tsk tsk. 15 suggestions? Yikes!
Grammarly is already suggesting edits, and I must say it really hurts to hit the dismiss button. You’re missing a few commas there, bud.

With a great start comes “Tempting offer.” I could already feel my skin start to shrivel up. Unfortunately, I don’t believe tempting is a good word to use in this scenario.

Let’s find you some antonyms instead to broaden your English knowledge.
DISSAPOINTING
POOR
REPELLENT/REPULSIVE OFFER
UNINVITING PROPOSAL
DETERRANT

All comes to mind. Let’s proceed.


“A woman, an ex, killed herself right in front of me.”

View attachment 337549

Holy shit, my condolences. I’d recommend you get some therapy instead of alting on an internet forum.

“She wanted my cock (“I don’t know if it’d all fit in my mouth, it’s so veiny and big blah blah”
Wait…
Hold up…..
Threw a fun fact in there, didn’t ya? Typically, you need a good transition phrase before dropping in a “truth bomb” of that capacity. I probably would have segwayed into discussing how you’ve been doing recently.
Obviously quite poorly. There are plenty of internet resources at your disposal if you’re capable of finding niche internet forums *smiley angel*
I’ll recommend this source for future reference!

Fuck I got shivers though. You must be really manly to describe yourself that way. I’m feeling like Andrew Tate's aura. It makes me think of a bald man with a really big belly.

“but anyway… she was a glazer and suicidal, not exactly arousing), she hated me, but she wanted to fuck me before ending her sad life”

OHhhhhhhh I understand it now, was anyway your transition? Fuck that’s wild. I feel like I’m reading some filthy AO3 fanfiction right now.

I like how you threw in the literary device of imagery. I’m almost picturing one of snow white’s dwarves fantasizing about a princess. I also think it’s a little insensitive in 2026 to write fanfictions including a girl killing herself. It kind of pushes the outdated damsel in distress plot. I’m sure you could come up with a better way to gain sympathy, instead of making it seem like you’re getting off on the thought of a woman wanting you so badly she will go to death and beyond to have you.

“I put people at ease, even if it’s in eerie ways. Hatred is part of that”
I don’t feel very at ease right now, so your best interest would be in keeping your story and behavior consistent. The hatred part is also a bit of a stretch, I think nauseating might be more proper.

Skipping past a sentence to eliminate redundancy, we get to
“Your feigned innocence is hot”
homelander-disappointed.gif

Thanks, I guess.

“We both know how kinky you are”
I can assure you that you don’t dear. Try again?

“So, if you want, secretly, whenever you’re horny, I’m at your disposal (or you’re at mine). No attachment, I just want to please you and... me too. I would be pretty rough, though.”

Oops. Sorry about the secret part. Quite a few people have shared a laugh already.
Those asexual girls reallllyy be freaks right?? I bet another one of your fantasies would be getting freaky with a monastery sister, or even better, a mime. This whole thing is framed to make it seem like it’s my idea, but honestly, it’s kind of reeking of desperation. I expect better from a self-proclaimed man whore yk?

“if you accept, I’ll give you a big surprise, a big reward…”
View attachment 337550
“otherwise, well… never mind.”
Yeah, sorry, unfortunately, I’m going to have to pass on that one.

“I’ve got ways (other people) to kill boredom, as you’ll have noticed”
Uhhh, I couldn’t care less what you do in your free time. Don’t think I particularly kept up to date with all of your Discord kitten rendezvous. But like cute! You have an e cuck chair lined up.


“The negative feelings you have towards me would increase the amplitude of your arousal. You could feel like the slut every woman wants to be without being judged for it”

Hmm, surprisingly on point with the negative feelings. Let's see if your “good read” continues.

Oh, wait, stop right there. Why would I want some creepy old man to boss me around? I have a loving partner with whom I spend time every single day. I think if I wanted to whore around, it wouldn’t take too much convincing. Just the whole internet aspect gets in the way. But I imagine that for a cripple, this is the only way you can get real play. I almost feel sorry for you.

“I won’t give you an immediate deadline. It’s your choice”
Aweeeeeeeeee this is so sweet! I think my answer is pretty clearly check that Google Calendar date off as a NEVER. Since I’m courteous enough to respond quickly, I think it’s a good idea to leave me alone.

Yawnnnnnn I’m a little tired after all of that. My ribs hurt from laughing.

In conclusion, he’s all yours @Duchesse

Other potentially interested readers. [USER=69236]@tuberculosisinmybal
@Randomized @emo kid clutching @pompompurino 💀💀💀

How is someone witnessing a suicide funny ?
 
Every morning that I wake up brings new challenges. Sometimes it feels like I’ve been bashed on the head with tung tung tung sahurs wooden bat. Other times, I’m excited to discover what lies in store for me today.
View attachment 337558
Truly like gambling. But sometimes you receive a message so legendary it makes your day.


Have you ever looked at someone and wondered what was going on inside their head?
Unfortunately, I cannot answer that question without seeing a lot of extra brain fluff or memories I didn’t want to be aware of. But when someone makes their memories so easily available, it’s hard to sit back and not comment on it.

Let’s annotate this with me.



“I have a tempting offer for you, little swan

Ummmm, recently something has probably killed what little conscience I had left
A woman, an ex, killed herself right in front of me. She wanted my cock (“I don’t know if it’d all fit in my mouth, it’s so veiny and big blah blah” but anyway… she was a glazer and suicidal, not exactly arousing), she hated me, but she wanted to fuck me before ending her sad life
I put people at ease, even if it’s in eerie ways. Hatred is part of that


Let’s get to the point.
Your feigned innocence is hot

We both know how kinky you are
So, if you want, secretly, whenever you’re horny, I’m at your disposal (or you’re at mine). No attachment, I just want to please you and... me too. I would be pretty rough, though.
if you accept, I’ll give you a big surprise, a big reward… otherwise, well… never mind. I’ve got ways (other people) to kill boredom, as you’ll have noticed

The negative feelings you have towards me would increase the amplitude of your arousal. You could feel like the slut every woman wants to be without being judged for it

I won’t give you an immediate deadline. It’s your choice
Report me or do whatever you like, in the meantime

Good luck with your life, anyway”
View attachment 337548

Tsk tsk tsk. 15 suggestions? Yikes!
Grammarly is already suggesting edits, and I must say it really hurts to hit the dismiss button. You’re missing a few commas there, bud.

With a great start comes “Tempting offer.” I could already feel my skin start to shrivel up. Unfortunately, I don’t believe tempting is a good word to use in this scenario.

Let’s find you some antonyms instead to broaden your English knowledge.
DISSAPOINTING
POOR
REPELLENT/REPULSIVE OFFER
UNINVITING PROPOSAL
DETERRANT

All comes to mind. Let’s proceed.


“A woman, an ex, killed herself right in front of me.”

View attachment 337549

Holy shit, my condolences. I’d recommend you get some therapy instead of alting on an internet forum.

“She wanted my cock (“I don’t know if it’d all fit in my mouth, it’s so veiny and big blah blah”
Wait…
Hold up…..
Threw a fun fact in there, didn’t ya? Typically, you need a good transition phrase before dropping in a “truth bomb” of that capacity. I probably would have segwayed into discussing how you’ve been doing recently.
Obviously quite poorly. There are plenty of internet resources at your disposal if you’re capable of finding niche internet forums *smiley angel*
I’ll recommend this source for future reference!

Fuck I got shivers though. You must be really manly to describe yourself that way. I’m feeling like Andrew Tate's aura. It makes me think of a bald man with a really big belly.

“but anyway… she was a glazer and suicidal, not exactly arousing), she hated me, but she wanted to fuck me before ending her sad life”

OHhhhhhhh I understand it now, was anyway your transition? Fuck that’s wild. I feel like I’m reading some filthy AO3 fanfiction right now.

I like how you threw in the literary device of imagery. I’m almost picturing one of snow white’s dwarves fantasizing about a princess. I also think it’s a little insensitive in 2026 to write fanfictions including a girl killing herself. It kind of pushes the outdated damsel in distress plot. I’m sure you could come up with a better way to gain sympathy, instead of making it seem like you’re getting off on the thought of a woman wanting you so badly she will go to death and beyond to have you.

“I put people at ease, even if it’s in eerie ways. Hatred is part of that”
I don’t feel very at ease right now, so your best interest would be in keeping your story and behavior consistent. The hatred part is also a bit of a stretch, I think nauseating might be more proper.

Skipping past a sentence to eliminate redundancy, we get to
“Your feigned innocence is hot”
homelander-disappointed.gif

Thanks, I guess.

“We both know how kinky you are”
I can assure you that you don’t dear. Try again?

“So, if you want, secretly, whenever you’re horny, I’m at your disposal (or you’re at mine). No attachment, I just want to please you and... me too. I would be pretty rough, though.”

Oops. Sorry about the secret part. Quite a few people have shared a laugh already.
Those asexual girls reallllyy be freaks right?? I bet another one of your fantasies would be getting freaky with a monastery sister, or even better, a mime. This whole thing is framed to make it seem like it’s my idea, but honestly, it’s kind of reeking of desperation. I expect better from a self-proclaimed man whore yk?

“if you accept, I’ll give you a big surprise, a big reward…”
View attachment 337550
“otherwise, well… never mind.”
Yeah, sorry, unfortunately, I’m going to have to pass on that one.

“I’ve got ways (other people) to kill boredom, as you’ll have noticed”
Uhhh, I couldn’t care less what you do in your free time. Don’t think I particularly kept up to date with all of your Discord kitten rendezvous. But like cute! You have an e cuck chair lined up.


“The negative feelings you have towards me would increase the amplitude of your arousal. You could feel like the slut every woman wants to be without being judged for it”

Hmm, surprisingly on point with the negative feelings. Let's see if your “good read” continues.

Oh, wait, stop right there. Why would I want some creepy old man to boss me around? I have a loving partner with whom I spend time every single day. I think if I wanted to whore around, it wouldn’t take too much convincing. Just the whole internet aspect gets in the way. But I imagine that for a cripple, this is the only way you can get real play. I almost feel sorry for you.

“I won’t give you an immediate deadline. It’s your choice”
Aweeeeeeeeee this is so sweet! I think my answer is pretty clearly check that Google Calendar date off as a NEVER. Since I’m courteous enough to respond quickly, I think it’s a good idea to leave me alone.

Yawnnnnnn I’m a little tired after all of that. My ribs hurt from laughing.

In conclusion, he’s all yours @Duchesse @necrotic

Other potentially interested readers. @tuberculosisinmybal
@Randomized @emo kid clutching @pompompurino 💀💀💀

too much yap
 
Every morning that I wake up brings new challenges. Sometimes it feels like I’ve been bashed on the head with tung tung tung sahurs wooden bat. Other times, I’m excited to discover what lies in store for me today.
View attachment 337558
Truly like gambling. But sometimes you receive a message so legendary it makes your day.


Have you ever looked at someone and wondered what was going on inside their head?
Unfortunately, I cannot answer that question without seeing a lot of extra brain fluff or memories I didn’t want to be aware of. But when someone makes their memories so easily available, it’s hard to sit back and not comment on it.

Let’s annotate this with me.



“I have a tempting offer for you, little swan

Ummmm, recently something has probably killed what little conscience I had left
A woman, an ex, killed herself right in front of me. She wanted my cock (“I don’t know if it’d all fit in my mouth, it’s so veiny and big blah blah” but anyway… she was a glazer and suicidal, not exactly arousing), she hated me, but she wanted to fuck me before ending her sad life
I put people at ease, even if it’s in eerie ways. Hatred is part of that


Let’s get to the point.
Your feigned innocence is hot

We both know how kinky you are
So, if you want, secretly, whenever you’re horny, I’m at your disposal (or you’re at mine). No attachment, I just want to please you and... me too. I would be pretty rough, though.
if you accept, I’ll give you a big surprise, a big reward… otherwise, well… never mind. I’ve got ways (other people) to kill boredom, as you’ll have noticed

The negative feelings you have towards me would increase the amplitude of your arousal. You could feel like the slut every woman wants to be without being judged for it

I won’t give you an immediate deadline. It’s your choice
Report me or do whatever you like, in the meantime

Good luck with your life, anyway”
View attachment 337548

Tsk tsk tsk. 15 suggestions? Yikes!
Grammarly is already suggesting edits, and I must say it really hurts to hit the dismiss button. You’re missing a few commas there, bud.

With a great start comes “Tempting offer.” I could already feel my skin start to shrivel up. Unfortunately, I don’t believe tempting is a good word to use in this scenario.

Let’s find you some antonyms instead to broaden your English knowledge.
DISSAPOINTING
POOR
REPELLENT/REPULSIVE OFFER
UNINVITING PROPOSAL
DETERRANT

All comes to mind. Let’s proceed.


“A woman, an ex, killed herself right in front of me.”

View attachment 337549

Holy shit, my condolences. I’d recommend you get some therapy instead of alting on an internet forum.

“She wanted my cock (“I don’t know if it’d all fit in my mouth, it’s so veiny and big blah blah”
Wait…
Hold up…..
Threw a fun fact in there, didn’t ya? Typically, you need a good transition phrase before dropping in a “truth bomb” of that capacity. I probably would have segwayed into discussing how you’ve been doing recently.
Obviously quite poorly. There are plenty of internet resources at your disposal if you’re capable of finding niche internet forums *smiley angel*
I’ll recommend this source for future reference!

Fuck I got shivers though. You must be really manly to describe yourself that way. I’m feeling like Andrew Tate's aura. It makes me think of a bald man with a really big belly.

“but anyway… she was a glazer and suicidal, not exactly arousing), she hated me, but she wanted to fuck me before ending her sad life”

OHhhhhhhh I understand it now, was anyway your transition? Fuck that’s wild. I feel like I’m reading some filthy AO3 fanfiction right now.

I like how you threw in the literary device of imagery. I’m almost picturing one of snow white’s dwarves fantasizing about a princess. I also think it’s a little insensitive in 2026 to write fanfictions including a girl killing herself. It kind of pushes the outdated damsel in distress plot. I’m sure you could come up with a better way to gain sympathy, instead of making it seem like you’re getting off on the thought of a woman wanting you so badly she will go to death and beyond to have you.

“I put people at ease, even if it’s in eerie ways. Hatred is part of that”
I don’t feel very at ease right now, so your best interest would be in keeping your story and behavior consistent. The hatred part is also a bit of a stretch, I think nauseating might be more proper.

Skipping past a sentence to eliminate redundancy, we get to
“Your feigned innocence is hot”
homelander-disappointed.gif

Thanks, I guess.

“We both know how kinky you are”
I can assure you that you don’t dear. Try again?

“So, if you want, secretly, whenever you’re horny, I’m at your disposal (or you’re at mine). No attachment, I just want to please you and... me too. I would be pretty rough, though.”

Oops. Sorry about the secret part. Quite a few people have shared a laugh already.
Those asexual girls reallllyy be freaks right?? I bet another one of your fantasies would be getting freaky with a monastery sister, or even better, a mime. This whole thing is framed to make it seem like it’s my idea, but honestly, it’s kind of reeking of desperation. I expect better from a self-proclaimed man whore yk?

“if you accept, I’ll give you a big surprise, a big reward…”
View attachment 337550
“otherwise, well… never mind.”
Yeah, sorry, unfortunately, I’m going to have to pass on that one.

“I’ve got ways (other people) to kill boredom, as you’ll have noticed”
Uhhh, I couldn’t care less what you do in your free time. Don’t think I particularly kept up to date with all of your Discord kitten rendezvous. But like cute! You have an e cuck chair lined up.


“The negative feelings you have towards me would increase the amplitude of your arousal. You could feel like the slut every woman wants to be without being judged for it”

Hmm, surprisingly on point with the negative feelings. Let's see if your “good read” continues.

Oh, wait, stop right there. Why would I want some creepy old man to boss me around? I have a loving partner with whom I spend time every single day. I think if I wanted to whore around, it wouldn’t take too much convincing. Just the whole internet aspect gets in the way. But I imagine that for a cripple, this is the only way you can get real play. I almost feel sorry for you.

“I won’t give you an immediate deadline. It’s your choice”
Aweeeeeeeeee this is so sweet! I think my answer is pretty clearly check that Google Calendar date off as a NEVER. Since I’m courteous enough to respond quickly, I think it’s a good idea to leave me alone.

Yawnnnnnn I’m a little tired after all of that. My ribs hurt from laughing.

In conclusion, he’s all yours @Duchesse @necrotic

Other potentially interested readers. @tuberculosisinmybal
@Randomized @emo kid clutching @pompompurino 💀💀💀

I'm not reading all that
Can someone elab a tldr
 
Saw few pretty birds today
shit really? You must have hit your head hard I don’t think there’s any birds in your corner of the world
 
nice wattpad fanfic tho
 
IMG_9513.webp


OP, whilst stalking the threads where I'm mentioned, as usual (it’s okay, I don’t mind)

Offer is still super valid,
Having e-sex with me twenty times instead of nineteen doesn’t make much difference

Fantastic thread
 

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