So basically it all started on an economy class where they presented us a new student called isa who spoke like 9 languages, genuinely insane i was mirin, and when classes started passing by my friends told me she looked at me a lot and i just didn’t wanna hear anything about it tbh, not that i wasn’t attracted but my neurodivergency just couldn’t do it, but one day they told me she said to other girls a was handsome and shit, so i said ok fuck ima talk to her, so when class finished i just approached her and started talking to her, she was like very nice and open, so i felt very comfortable, i walked her to class and that was our first impression, then when i got home she requested me on insta, and we started talking on ig about lots of things, mostly school and mutual friends, i was genuinely doing backflips in my room from excitement, i also started accompanying her on breaks bc i didn’t want her to be searching all around the school for ppl to talk to, and we hit it off a lot, she was literally perfect personality wise for me, like she talked a lot, when i say a lot i mean a lot, like she led the conv 95% of the time, but i was really fine with that since i really i’m more of a listener, and she was very vibrant and active, she had adhd so that was one of the reasons why but i loved that tbh, so after that i just asked her if she wanted to go on a date and show her the city, so we went to the city, and it was phenomenal, we went near the river and sit there talking about our beliefs, and shit like that, very deep, then i bought us some ice cream and it was really good also, it finished with me getting her to the bus station and then i went home, pretty much we still had the same vibe at school so after some time i asked her on a second date since she asked if i wanted to go with her to look for a dress for the carnivals of our city, so i just agreed and asked her to go for dinner after that, so on the second date it also was awesome, we went through the whole city looking for shops with dresses and that stuff and it was super entertaining, mainly bc of her presencie, then we went into a park and she just started showing me things on her camera roll, then we went to a cafeteria and had coffe, there we talked about relationships and stuff and she said she didn’t know if she was ready to have a relationship in spain, like giving me a hint, i think im pretty persuasive so i just pretty much used some arguments to show her it wasn’t that crazy, and she gave me the reason while we both looked at each other knowing what that meant and laughed, then we went to the restaurant and eat typical spanish food with a steak, i paid also for this shit, my wallet was shivering atp, but i was willing to do that for her icl, so after dinner we just went into a pretty chill place to sit and we had our moment, then my parents picked us up and she really liked to talk with my mom and viceversa, she talked so much that she even outdid my mom that also talks a lot jfl, i was just mirin her and the way she talked tbh, then my mom played some music and she was so low inhib she started singing out loud and the music was ultra loud and i and my mom also started singing, after that we just left her home and i felt the most lucky man otw on that exact moment, so after that, as time passed by her time in spain was just shortening, and she came one break telling me that she wasn’t sure about this whole thing, i tried to convince her but she was really close minded this time, to put context she was changing families by that time and was really stressed, so by the end of the day i told her that she changed her mind really quien, so i just wanted her to give it a second thought, i just really liked her, but she went on defensive mode saying i wasn’t thinking about her and her situation and i was thinking too much about myself and my interests, tho it wouldn’t have stolen her not even 5 minutes of her time to just think about it, so she just didn’t want to talk to me anymore, and time went by and i was seeing her every break with other ppl, as beatiful as she was and i was getting more sad each day, so her birthday ( yes i remembered it ) was coming up and even if we wasn’t talking anymore i decided to make her a letter and give her a jesus figure since she was christian, i wasn’t really capable of giving her that after all that happened so i just asked a guy on his class to give it to her, after that she on a random day when i least expected it, came up to me and thanked me for the present, she thought it was really sweet and she told me that if i ever needed help with something or i was gonna visit switzerland i could text her, that was lifefuel for me even if a relationship wasn’t possible, so after that her time on spain was like super short, she was leaving in like 2 weeks and she appeared in class with a spanish flag and started to ask ppl of all promotion to sign it for her, typical thing an exchange student does, the thing that broke my heart is that after she noticed me, she didn’t ask for my signature, it was very heart breaking, after all i did for her it just felt like i was nothing for her in her period on spain, i felt so sad, genuinely i was crying every night about it, idk why am i even venting this but idgaf, so after she left, on summer i had an idea of going to switzerland with my parents, not to see her, but just for the countrie, so i just texted her on that regard and she left me on seen, it was really brutal and still remember it with nostalgia to this day, but i think i’ve learnt plenty of things after that experience so i don’t regret it at all