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Serious Was close to killing myself yesterday

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I did. Was christian for 4 years and instead of helping me god made me get bullied by my classnates/ allowed it to happen
Yea i get that that was god testing me but in the bible it also says that if u put god first life will be easier and i did that for these 4 years and nothing changed, it only got worse, i used to pray everyday that my depression and other stuff goes away but it only got worse till i had frequent suicidal thoughts.
I dont think god exists but if he does i hate him
 
Had everything i need to kms
And was about to do it
But i pussied out and thats good.
Im happy that im still alive
There is no greater fuel for life until you kiss death. There is nothing more scary than being near it.
 
Had everything i need to kms
And was about to do it
But i pussied out and thats good.
Im happy that im still alive
most survivors report instant feelings of regret halfway thru doing it,, It sounds cliche but its rly never the answer i hope u get better


idk if u watched bojack horsman but theres an episode called the view from halfway down and its rly beautiful i think u shuld watch it s6 e15 ,,
 
I did. Was christian for 4 years and instead of helping me god made me get bullied by my classnates/ allowed it to happen
Yea i get that that was god testing me but in the bible it also says that if u put god first life will be easier and i did that for these 4 years and nothing changed, it only got worse, i used to pray everyday that my depression and other stuff goes away but it only got worse till i had frequent suicidal thoughts.
I dont think god exists but if he does i hate him
you can't be "christian for 4 years", once you get the salvation nothing can take it off of you.
also all this "suicidal thoughts" its your pride, thinking about you as "how pity of me, how could this happend to me, i dont deserve this"
Like Jesus didnt get his back open wounded, and didn't complain at all. matter fact, he didnt say a word. And he was a sinless person.
all for you to think about yourself as someone who thinks that dont deserve to "get bullied" or some shit
by now you would be in hell if it wasnt because of Gods patience for us. U didn't do something right, so go back on your steps and repent, try again, because his mercy knows no limits
 
most survivors report instant feelings of regret halfway thru doing it
I experienced that, thats why i pussied out
It sounds cliche but its rly never the answer i hope u get better


idk if u watched bojack horsman but theres an episode called the view from halfway down and its rly beautiful i think u shuld watch it s6 e15 ,,
I ll give it a try
 
I did. Was christian for 4 years and instead of helping me god made me get bullied by my classnates/ allowed it to happen
Yea i get that that was god testing me but in the bible it also says that if u put god first life will be easier and i did that for these 4 years and nothing changed, it only got worse, i used to pray everyday that my depression and other stuff goes away but it only got worse till i had frequent suicidal thoughts.
I dont think god exists but if he does i hate him
how old r u?

I had the same experience w religion nd im still on the path to figure everyth out but i dont thinkn"seeking God" is the answer
it helps some ppl not all

u shuld work on urself, on ur mental, u shuld know what helps u and stay away from what doesnt
life isnt all rainbows and kitties and happy 24/7 ur bound to run into horrible days or months even but that doesnt determin the rest of ur life
my hs counselor told me it has to get harder before it gets better when my friend committed and those words helped me alot
life isnt easy, u hv to make it easy
 
how old r u?

I had the same experience w religion nd im still on the path to figure everyth out but i dont thinkn"seeking God" is the answer
it helps some ppl not all

u shuld work on urself, on ur mental, u shuld know what helps u and stay away from what doesnt
life isnt all rainbows and kitties and happy 24/7 ur bound to run into horrible days or months even but that doesnt determin the rest of ur life
my hs counselor told me it has to get harder before it gets better when my friend committed and those words helped me alot
life isnt easy, u hv to make it easy
Im 17 now, i became christian when i was 12
And im trying , i go to the gym, i try to get over my fears, etc
 
I did. Was christian for 4 years and instead of helping me god made me get bullied by my classnates/ allowed it to happen
Yea i get that that was god testing me but in the bible it also says that if u put god first life will be easier and i did that for these 4 years and nothing changed, it only got worse, i used to pray everyday that my depression and other stuff goes away but it only got worse till i had frequent suicidal thoughts.
I dont think god exists but if he does i hate him
its never worth it, i tried it. sounds cliche but life is a blessing, there may be alot of suffering but its just beautiful to live. i dont know if god exists or not but this is your one chance at life, keep holding on. Nothing lasts forever anyways, even your suffering wont.
 
its never worth it, i tried it. sounds cliche but life is a blessing, there may be alot of suffering but its just beautiful to live. i dont know if god exists or not but this is your one chance at life, keep holding on. Nothing lasts forever anyways, even your suffering wont.
I will, i think the suffering is worth it for the(few) happy moments in life.
and since im only 17 i think i still have time to change my life for the better yk
 
Don't do that brother, I'm here if anything :peepoLove:
Btw how did you plan to ctb?
 
Had everything i need to kms
And was about to do it
But i pussied out and thats good.
Im happy that im still alive
OIP-4235165477.webp
 
there's always a solution brother, no need to do it to yourself

why don't you try to leave this forum? focus on other things for a while
 
Please don't brother
life as an incel is pointless,
being a betabuxxer for some used whore who has 40+ body count, who likely would cheat on me, would be the other option
and whites getting replaced+new world governement+ rising crime rates
the future doesnt look good.
even if i was chad i would still likely kill myself in my 20s.
I wont kms now, i wanna watch anime and play video games to at least experience some fun instead of being bitter and depressed
 

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