Reward your children for having a voice of their own and their ability to deny things. If they say no to something and it seems logical, then just respect their decision.
Do not prioritise work or some other thing over your own child, show them that they are worth your time more than anything.
Ask them carefully about choices, which one they deem as the good and the bad choice and why, explain to them carefully the context behind the choices and make sure to question the choice they made to them. Once they get a hang of it and become self-conscious and analysing of their actions, reinforce that their version of what is right and wrong should be placed on a pedestal that should only be shake-able to people around them that they highly respect.
Do not scold them for being themselves, it makes them more reserved and bound to figurative rules that lingers into the rest of their lives if they are not self-aware. Making them more reserved and less confident in their own selves.
Reward or avoid scolding risk-taking, like seemingly mindless rambunctiousness like climbing a tree or something. They will learn themselves how to properly engage at risk activities and become slowly used to it. (Scolding this will only make the association that risk = bad, anxious, scary) It will only impede their freedom in their actions, make them more complacent to mindless authority, less confident in their ability to take calculated risks or be in a ruling position.
Do not base their self-esteem on just reward patterns for their performances. For example if they do not do 100% on something then do not seem disappointed in them, do not selectively reward if they do the best at stuff or not, do not base their lives off of purely positive attention. This will just make them approval-chasing, and any-time they are not liked 100% or someone shows disappointment (whether an important person or not) they will feel heavily insecure, hollow, and uneasy. Teach them that approval of others does not mean much in the grand-scheme of things, people are stupid. But also highlight that it is good to listen to people's criticism when they make logical sense.
Just fucking reward any creativity under the fucking sun. If they suggest that they want a tree-house, agree and go build it with them. It will reinforce that their voice matters, that their effort that is placed on their dreams can make it come true, pursuing something with effort will feel effortless to them later on since they are so familiar with it. If you repeatedly deny situations like these, they will disregard their own visions as being worthless/a waste of time/unsure if it will pay off and they will likely rarely pursue anything that has effort and more specifically creative effort.
Teach them that authority, like people in highly respected uniforms (police, doctors etc) do not have any actual true authority over them. They should just be 'complacent' to them because of convenience but should not view them as being above them. They are just grown babies with some life-experience playing dress up essentially, they are not absolute.
Reinforce that helping/loving people doesn't need to be transactional at all. Doing it purely off of transactional dynamics makes the whole action in the first place dishonest. Encourage that they should do it out of their own will and not because they expect something in return, yet they can always appreciate if someone gives you something back in return. This makes them less hollow of a character overall.
Do not fall trapped by performative behaviours as a parent. For example this is very common if you do not show your child basic love, they will result into being performative in order to draw attention whether good or bad (this is 100% the parents fault) and will linger for the rest of their lives if the parent doesn't become aware of their own dumb subconscious reinforcement.
Teach them that it is actually okay if people depend on them and not bad, they shouldn't seek for people depending on them consciously, but shouldn't turn cold on the people that do at the same time.
That is a very basic behavioural waffling, most of this is applicable to both genders.
Now feed them like they are a calf growing into a bvll so they turn out like Emmett Cullen n****r.
